
To get a restraining order, you must file a petition with your local courthouse, detailing the incidents of abuse or harassment, and then have a temporary restraining order (TRO) granted by a judge. If a TRO is issued, a hearing will be scheduled, where both parties can present their cases for a judge to decide on a final, longer-lasting order. You can often find the necessary forms at the courthouse or on the court's website, and victim advocates can provide assistance with the process.
If she hasn’t done anything and you can’t prove anything, then don’t because you’ll have to prove your charges. In NY state, you can go through criminal or family court. Family court has a lower burden of proof. However, if you cannot prove any of your allegations then she may be able to civilly sue you for costs of court, legal fees, etc. Victim advocates can help you if you go down this route. Title IX office can also issue a No Contact Order which is easier.