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AITA 12w
My mom keeps making suggestions for how I should set up my apartment but if I don’t accept the suggestion and do things her way she starts yelling at me saying I’m being picky. I’m being polite when I decline the suggestions, am I being picky?
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8
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Anonymous 12w

It’s ur apartment so her opinion doesn’t matter unless she’s living there everyday

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Anonymous 12w

You aren’t being picky. I would say she’s being picky, but honestly she’s being controlling and manipulative Hope this new apartment gives you some much-needed separation 🙏🏻 Remember, even if you’re right and she won’t allow your dad to visit, you can still go see him. Don’t think of it as losing them, think of it as asserting your independence and establishing a bit of freedom

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Anonymous 12w

Absolutely not! It’s your apartment and you get to decorate it or organize it however TF you want!

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Anonymous 12w

On the other hand, she might just be “nesting” your new place out of a good motherly place

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Anonymous replying to -> yoitsbrieee 12w

That’s what I tried explaining to her, I’m gonna be the one living in it. But when I said that she threatened to not visit me because she “won’t be able to stand seeing how I set it up” and “I guess I’m not living here so I’m not allowed here”. She’s mad about where I want to put the couch and TV because it “doesn’t make sense”. My dad is mad saying I’m stubborn and I should just agree with her so they can visit me but I don’t see how it’s my fault that she won’t visit me over a couch and TV…

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Anonymous replying to -> OP 12w

Respectfully you need to stand your ground. This is not her home, it's yours. Unless your set up poses a danger to you, do whatever you want. If she choses to be petty and not visit over you choosing what you want to do in the place you live at then thats just the kind of person she unfortunately is

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Anonymous replying to -> #2 12w

It just sucks to lose my dad over it too because I know she won’t let him visit if she isn’t visiting and nothing I do or say will change her mind (other than giving in but that’s not an option I’m willing to take) because as you said that’s just the person she is

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Anonymous replying to -> #3 12w

Idk I don’t really view threatening to cut contact over the placement couch and TV as “out of a good mother place”.

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