Yeah… I struggle with these things as a fan of the manga. I can somewhat defend the use of the sexual assault as it obviously isn’t glorified, and ties in with the aforementioned turbo granny’s story and motivations. The presentation was gratuitous though. I do believe there is a place for depictions of SA in media. There are certainly issues with how it’s presented in Dan Da Dan, but I see what they’re going for. I can’t defend the underwear stuff though.
The appeal of Dan Da Dan isn’t in that weird shit though. I won’t deny that there are some creeps in it for the weird shit, but that’s not why I watch it. There’s good action, a strong cast of characters, a good love story, and a strong emotional core. It’s not perfect, far from it. Some of the issues are indefensible, and I fully understand why someone would drop the show because of them. Full disclosure, I am a dude, which certainly affects my perception of these things.