i would imagine you couldnt name 10 people who have embarrassed themselves in front of you in the last year. try to realize that people are already too worried about themselves to actually truly take note of what youre up to. this coming from a person who used to have crippling social anxiety but has broken out of my shell since college (im a 3rd year). and if you hate yourself, other people dont know that, and surrounding yourself with folks who build you up is a good idea to help with that