Anonymous #2 2w

A terrible way to put it, but I guess that gets the gist of it

14

Anonymous #1 2w

Is it more of that it grosses you out or is it related to you think that there’s some possible relationship issues?

13

Anonymous #2 2w

What do you mean by damaged goods?

2

Anonymous OP 2w

Been used by someone else

-5

Anonymous #3 2w

That’s an interesting perspective. Do you think that some of the guys with the mentality of wanting virgins are good or is it a red flag? I know it’s not all conclusive as the guys I know are great but I want to know your opinion on it

3

Anonymous #4 2w

I’ll make a poll to see

3

Anonymous #2 2w

I wouldn’t call that damaged, mate

9

Anonymous OP 2w

Give the poll some wiggle room, to try and encompass more types of guys

2

Anonymous #1 2w

I would

-2

Anonymous #6 2w

That’s a pretty sweet way of putting it. I know there’s some weirdos who only want virgin girls but it’s good to hear there’s men like this who want it to be special

3

Anonymous stanczyk 2w

There are reasons deeper than petty power dynamics/and inexperience that makes relationships between two virgins most desirable, primarily that those relationships tend to last longer and have a much greater degree of stability. Why is it's own discussion but either way it is an observable fact of relationships.

17

Anonymous stanczyk 2w

as for myself, with an East Orthodox Christian view of sexual morality premarital virginity between both partners is a basic requirement for marriage whose only moral alternative is celibacy.

17

Anonymous OP 2w

It depends on why the girl wants a virgin. Maybe it’s cause of religion or they themselves wanna have a shared first time I think that’s fine. But if a guy just wants you to be one and isn’t himself one and/or has a lot of bodies then it’s a red flag

18

Anonymous #8 2w

So you actively lie to potential partners to skew their view of you?

12

Anonymous #1 2w

I guess I used to but I haven’t had sex in a year since my last relationship ended. He never asked so can’t remember last time I felt like I would have lied but I have in the past

-3

Anonymous stanczyk 2w

Couldn’t have said it better myself as a fellow Christian

3

Anonymous stanczyk 2w

i'm a Christian and I used to think this but having sex before marriage doesn't make you less of a Christian. Sex is important to a relationship, and sexual incompatibility can lead to infidelity.

5

Anonymous #2 2w

why do u mean by used?

6

Anonymous #11 2w

You must not be Catholic or Orthodox because both of the oldest christian traditions would disagree.

0

Anonymous #11 2w

Use a dictionary at that point

-3

Anonymous #3 2w

^^^^^^^^^

1

Anonymous OP 2w

Yes

6

Anonymous #2 2w

As much as I’d love to be funny here, please think about how you just called women “goods.” Like bro, come on.

16

Anonymous inphochewated 2w

Like let’s think on the last time it was socially acceptable to think of humans as “goods.” Not a *good* way of seeing other humans.

14

Anonymous stanczyk 2w

lower divorce rates don’t necessarily equal happier or more stable/ functional relationships. they may just reflect cultural or religious pressure to remain married no matter what. i mean isn’t it kind of obvious that these numbers among virgin couples might be shaped by religious beliefs about divorce?

14

Anonymous inphochewated 2w

I see no problem here

-4

Anonymous #2 2w

You just likened a woman to a thing you can buy. If you don’t see the harm I wouldn’t trust you around women

5

Anonymous #2 2w

🪞

1

Anonymous #2 2w

why is the women in this caused used but not the man??

8

Anonymous stanczyk 2w

I'm not. Catholism being your background is definitely makes a lot of sense. Obviously sexual purity culture has had it's consequences within the Catholic church. I ask you this, if you think the church wasn't so strict abt purity culture do you think they wouldn't have all those scandals involving young boys? I'm all for waiting for whenever your ready, but supressing sexual desires never leads to a healthy relationship with sex.

2

Anonymous #11 2w

I also think that if there is anything that you could do that would make you "less of a Christian" then you don't believe in a God that forgives us for our sins.

5

Anonymous #11 2w

I'm not Catholic, I'm Orthodox

0

Anonymous OP 2w

I think it’s very hard to narrow it down, but there are aspects of it that can be considered “gross”. If I know my partner has had several sexual partners, it’s going to feel weird being “just another on the list” y’know? And that also leads into relationship issues, because if she’s had all these men and broken up with (or not pursued past sexual intent) all of them, then I would struggle to guess why I’d be different.

2

Anonymous stanczyk 2w

my point still stands, im non denominational. im not saying you shouldn't wait for marriage but i don't think you should shame other Christians who don't or frame as if it's makes someone less of a Christian because of it. Jesus loves us all and forgives us for our sins.

1

Anonymous #11 2w

I am not here you shame you, however when you insinuate premarital sex is at all compatible with the established Christian sexual morality that has existed since jesus was still on earth, such heresy is unacceptable. You can sin in this way if you choose to, but at the very least recognize it for what it is instead of twisting it into something good. To repent you must first recognize your sin.

0

Anonymous #11 2w

And if you are going to mention infidelity don't bullshit me. https://ifstudies.org/blog/the-road-to-infidelity-passes-through-multiple-sexual-partners

1

Anonymous stanczyk 2w

i never said premarital sex wasn't a sin. i said that you shouldn't shame others Christians and think of them of less of a Christian because they have premarital sex. You literally said the oldest Christian traditions would disagree implying that someone having premarital sex would make them less Christian even if they repented and sought forgiveness. That's not what I was thought. I was thought God loves us, and Jesus died for our sins. He understands we aren't perfect and will forgive us

1

Anonymous #11 2w

if we repent, regardless of what the sin is. It's only human to shame others for sinning and thinking of them as less of a Christian. It's exactly why so many Christians like what hellrasier said don't get divorces, because of the stigma, that Christians like you uphold of the judgment of their faith.

2

Anonymous #11 2w

Now I'm confused as to why you are trying to justify premarital sex with this second line if you agreed it was sinful. Me saying that the oldest Christian traditions disagree was to say that they disagree with a conception of moral sex that includes premarital sex or even sex between spouces for any end other than conception. If you are going to apparently try and justify immoral sex in this way I feel it natural that I would come to the conclusion you do not believe it is sinful.

-1

Anonymous #11 2w

Cyan: I never once said sin makes someone less Christian, the implication was the the traditional conception of moral sex within the church is incompatible with both premarital sex and sex for any end but conception. Red: I know you were not taught these things if you are nondenominational. As Christians even though it is true our sins are to be forgiven we should strive to live holy lives free from sin (or as best as we can do with our fallen nature) Yellow: You are putting words in my mouth.

0

Anonymous stanczyk 2w

Yall mfs be acting like sex is some kind of primal need that people will die by the age of 20 without having, have some self control ffs, same with infidelity

3

Anonymous #11 2w

Purple: Open your Bible to Matthew 19. The Orthodox Church believes divorce is a grave sin and the Catholics outright reject its existence. Of course Christians have lower divorce rates.

-1

Anonymous #10 2w

You are right, image is just for fun.

-1

Anonymous stanczyk 2w

Just don’t cheat on ur spouse it’s that simple

1

Anonymous #10 2w

Because unless they got r*ped or some other situation where they are forced into it, it is a choice that is consciously made by all parties involved

0

Anonymous stanczyk 2w

Okay, so this is just wrong. 1 Corinthians 7:4, states that a husband and wife have the right to each other's bodies and shouldn't stray away from sexual relations. Only to give time to pray, but they should came back together as a marital unit to avoid infidelity. So it's not a sin to have sex for pleasure as a married couple. I'm also not "justifying" premarital sex. It's a sin, but like all sins it can be forgiven, so that's why i don't see it as a problem if someone wants to have sex

1

Anonymous #11 2w

and i don't respect others who do have premarital sex or sin in other ways that don't hurt anyone else and aren't affecting my life directly. such as being openly queer. im not reading all the stuff you highlighted bc it isn't worth my time. it's probably the same "holier than thou" crap you've been spewing abt your strict Christian ideology. I've said it multiple times, that I believe in a God who forgives, and if that isn't good enough for you then I don't really care.

1

Anonymous #10 2w

I agree

1

Anonymous hellraiser 2w

Obviously athletes and frat guys with body counts in the quadruple digits aren’t gonna care, but most other men do care

1

well this is just my experience, i’m sure lots of women do struggle dating

2

Anonymous #14 2w

not really into athletes or frat guys, my usual type is alt guys. but yeah i think them not caring about it mostly has to do with the fact they’re like mid to late twenties with a lot of experience too

2

Anonymous #1 2w

and that’s why, as a woman, i despise bonnie blue, because her and that other girl have convinced men that women sleep with hundreds of men and unless you’re a virgin you’re a whore. no one except bonnie blue or other pornstars is sleeping with 1000 men

5

Anonymous #17 2w

That’s a common conception for a lot of guys. Like I said though, I don’t see 0-3 as that big a deal if the lady is worth it. Sure I take it into account but it’s not a “virgin or else” situation

0

Anonymous #1 2w

well comparing having more than that 0-3 to a woman with 1000+ is fucking wild lmfao

8

Anonymous #17 2w

Well yeah I know, but I don’t think a lot of women are like that. Some guys will use the whore tag for women who have slept with like, 2 or 3 other men. Was more so trying to address that point than the Bonnie Blue stuff, y’know?

2

Anonymous #1 2w

…but you were literally the one that said 0-3 and then said “more than that tends to get egregious. we don’t want someone like bonnie blue” lol

6