Are you dense? That shit almost ALWAYS, turns into DV

16

Hey so breaking/hitting/slamming things in front of your partner when you’re angry is actually part of domestic violence. It’s not something made up but an actual step in DV. They are either: 1. Someone lacking self control that needs to destroy something right then to feel better. Or 2. They are purposely doing it in front of you to show you how angry they are at you and let you know that “you caused this”. Both people are dangerous and not safe to be around. Both lead to DV or abuse.

15

That’s literally what you are arguing about with the original comment. A wall is a thing.

12

Dude. The original comment YOU replied to and argued with is about punching a hole in the wall in front of your partner. Being there to whiteness it.

12

You are talking about a whole lot of nothing right now, like super random ranting. You specifically said that punching a wall in front of your partner is not a warning sign for domestic violence, and I responded to that explaining it definitely IS a warning sign AND in some places it’s actually its own more minor charge for domestic violence.

9

Anonymous #9 9w

You realize that Ted Bundy would pretend to be injured and ask for help with doing a task and the women would go to help him and that’s how they got killed? Why is it that you assume these men actually show their true personality and intentions in front of the girl before she’s in the relationship and that she actively chose that anyway? Bad people are smart enough to hide it to their targets. Maybe only the bad people are responsible for their bad actions and not those who fell for the act.

10

Anonymous mother_russia 9w

Uh no actually yall just choose really frickin badly and when we tell you a guy is a problem or weird you don’t believe us ans then a week later he done did sum crazy. So no, in a rare occurrence maybe but the signs could be infront your face and you’d never know.

-3

Love how you’re arguing with DV worker rn. You have no idea what the signs of imminent danger to a woman in DV situation are. Expressing anger is FINE. Breaking things and punching things is NOT! Most people DO NOT, express their anger that way. Breaking things/punching holes in walls is a WARNING SIGN. If you don’t know what you’re talking about be quiet and sit down

13

It’s not just in front of your partner. When you do it alone it’s a precursor to doing it in front of or to your partner. Idk why you even decided to comment on my original statement when you clearly have no idea what you’re talking about. Self-education is a real thing. Ignorance and denial are the biggest problems in our world

12

If your punching holes in walls you got issues idc what made you that angry

13

No one said that why are you hearing it?

12

No you’re not supposed to suppress your emotions. You’re supposed to get fucking therapy if you’re turning to ANY violence when angry. Which clearly you need.

13

Anonymous mother_russia 9w

Ted bundy and a bunch other serial killers had people writing to the while they were in prison saying they loved them even after true colors have been shown people still fall for em

2

Anonymous #9 9w

Meanwhile most anti social nerds can go an entire decade without anyone falling in love with them lol

-5

Anonymous #11 9w

Yep and it’s hella sad

-3

Anonymous #9 9w

Yes because some people are equally as crazy, but the victims weren’t and that is the point. When crazy finds crazy, that’s not out of the ordinary.

1

So physical exertion helps let out anger but destroying things is not a healthy way to cope with anger. You can take boxing classes or get punching bags if that is truly how you let off steam, but other kinds of physical activity like running, lifting, swimming, etc. are better for long term anger control. Also anger is a very interesting emotion because it’s actually more secondary than other emotions (I will explain)

2

So anger is actually formed because of other feelings but it becomes anger because either those other feelings are suppressed OR they are intense so it comes out through anger. This isn’t to say you shouldn’t feel anger, but that when you feel angry you should also find the root feeling attached to it. Ex: being angry that someone wronged you by telling someone your secret. You’re sad that they hurt you and feel you can’t trust them with info anymore, but it converts to anger basically.

2

When you focus on the root of the feeling, it’s easier to pull the weeds aka solve the problem.

2

But I do truly want to specify that I have never once had a desire to hurt my bf. Or any of my friends. I’ve never wanted to hit them or cause them pain or harm. Not during any argument or any action that upset me. It truly isn’t normal to desire to hurt your partner. But your earlier comment made it sound like you have those desires and believe that’s normal. If you’re dating someone and they are saying they want to hit you or do hurt you, you need to leave that relationship.

1

“If I was that violent” dude… I never claimed you were violent. I just said it wasn’t a good coping mechanism. It really sounds like you’ve taken everything anyone has said super personally which makes it sound like you do actually do these things. You might want to try some anger management classes if you are struggling with breaking things or punching walls as an adult.

1

You say as you are also responding???

1

Leaving the room to calm down is nothing like punching a wall 💀 anger management classes are a whole separate thing btw. Also this is what I was referring to when talking about you said it was normal to want to or talk about hitting your partner:

1