Anonymous #3 12w

why

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Anonymous OP 12w

Scary

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Anonymous #3 12w

True

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That’s cap bro at least were expected to do it

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Anonymous #8 12w

*we’re

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Anonymous #8 12w

No I disagree I think the pleasant surprise of a woman making the move helps her chances

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Anonymous strawberry_hair 12w

For asking him out?

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Anonymous #3 12w

Yes. I was trying to gauge his feelings towards me (we knew each other) and I asked him out and then he and his friends harassed me for months.

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Anonymous strawberry_hair 12w

i’m so sorry this happened to you. see my friends have experienced this too and i was honestly afraid of being made fun of by the guy or his friends. I’m hoping that guys will act more mature now that we’re older ( probably not) but we’ll see 😅

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Anonymous strawberry_hair 12w

Damn sorry that sucks

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Anonymous OP 12w

There’s always a risk of that stuff asking anyone out unfortunately. Thankfully no girls have ever been rude to me about it, but I’ve definitely heard stories

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Anonymous OP 12w

I hope so as well! Honestly I just try to approach them if they are alone. There’s a lot less of a chance for harassment that way. My experiences shouldn’t stop you from asking out guys you like. I’ve asked out guys before (friends of mine) and they were great about it. Try not to worry so much but stay cautious.

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Anonymous #9 12w

It’s okay! Sometimes it happens. Picking “the right person” can be hard. But it at least taught me the kind of situation where I will never accept a date from a guy.

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Anonymous strawberry_hair 12w

You’re the GOAT strawberry_hair, you deserve the best

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Anonymous #9 12w

Thank you, I really appreciate it. I’ve learned a lot of lessons and if that means I have to wait a bit longer to find someone who properly supports me in a way I deserve? I’ll wait for as long as it takes.

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Anonymous strawberry_hair 12w

I’m kind of realizing the same thing as I’m getting more into dating. Or maybe it’s different idk. I used to be so stressed that I was running out of time and seeing my friends in strong relationships made me feel like less. Now that I’m more comfortable with myself and in a better place I’m just enjoying the ride. I like meeting people and trying new things and that’s what dating is all about. I feel no more need to rush to something cause I know my worth and I’m enjoying the process anyways

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Anonymous #9 12w

After my last boyfriend broke my heart (which sounds drastic but that’s what it felt like) I took a step back. I realized I was dating because while I liked them, I was uncomfortable being alone. Now I’m a much more stable person.

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Anonymous strawberry_hair 12w

I’ve never been in such a serious relationship before, but it seems like that is what it feels like. I’m so fucking single I’ve had nothing but time to grow comfortable being alone. It’s been a process, but I’m back to putting myself out there which is great

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Anonymous strawberry_hair 12w

I’m glad that you’re in a better place

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Anonymous #9 12w

I wish you all the luck on finding a good serious relationship! And thank you I’m in a much better place. Time heals a lot of wounds. I just need to find/ meet someone who meets my admittedly harder standards than most for our generation.

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Anonymous strawberry_hair 12w

I wish you the best of luck too! Have a wonderful rest of your day!

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Anonymous strawberry_hair 12w

Yeah this is the problem with society, we've made it so being alone is some awful thing that people should seek to fix ASAP. Thankfully that mindset seems to be disappearing some, but still...

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Anonymous #3 12w

I’m actually convinced that watching How I Met Your Mother when I was little made me a hopeless romantic. Fun show, but not a good depiction of what love or dating looks like or how people should think about it, especially for someone who is too young to understand any of it

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Anonymous #3 12w

And social media has made people feel particularly isolated and inadequate

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Anonymous #9 12w

Hated the ending so much

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Anonymous #3 12w

I think it was less society and more my own self worth issues. I had a rough childhood with a lot of bullying and depression. I believed that if I was not helping someone else I was worthless. And so a relationship sort of helped those fears. I didn’t take advantage of anyone I dated because I truly did like them all. But you need to be comfortable being venerable in order to have a healthy relationship.

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If you expect rejection then that’s kinda sad. Of course it happens and you should be able to take it in stride, but idk I never really go into an interaction expecting rejection

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I never said it wasn’t better odds. There is risks involved for asking men out. That is what I was pointing out. Not to mention many men who have admitted they would go out with “anyone who expresses interest.” Either way that’s not what I was talking about.

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Also I don’t think she was making a comparison, she was just saying that not everyone will say yes which is totally true

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Eh maybe that’s your reality

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I dont think it’s that different. Once you realize that rejection is just a part of life, and your life is exactly the same as it was before and after the interaction, it’s not that scary. I’m sure some people can be rude, but most people are gokd about it if you are respectful to them

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I don’t think you understand what I was saying. But if you want to play the oppression Olympics then we can. Women have gotten raped for asking men out because “that’s consenting to rape.” Men may experience discomfort and have people be mean or harass them. But there’s still way more risk for women. That was still never the conversation.

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No I agree women are more successful, I’m just not hung up on it I just shoot my shot man

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Y’all should kiss

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In my opinion people should just ask people out if they’re interested. I encourage my girl friends to do the same as well. And my guy friends that are nervous I hype them up too. we should just all be doing it, no reason not to in my opinion

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“Don’t force extreme and fringe occurrences into this…” he says as he forces an extreme and fringe occurrence into this

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The getting beat up and shot part! Respectfully, I think you’re too online

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I see people say this type of stuff almost exclusively on the Internet. Hardly anybody I know of has had these experiences irl though

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Oh my bad I guess. Still a much less noteworthy thing to consider than sexual assault in my opinion which is far more common

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It’s so rare? You are wrong. 97% of women have experienced sexual harassment or assault. I have not met a single woman including myself who hasn’t experienced that. Don’t force extreme occurrences? Look at life.

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No I meant you’re too online for talking about how men have it so tough dating. Dating is just hard. Play the game. And there’s nothing wrong with being selective tbh if the end goal is a life partner

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True, but usually is not the result of asking people out or dating or anything. Dating violence against women heavily outweighs that against men

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Wow… you are an asshole

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I never said dating was hard because one guy made it a bad experience. Read what I said. I said there’s a risk. He made school hell for me. An ex-boyfriend stalked me. This is not one experience. I was explaining something to OP. Please stop putting words in my mouth.

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✋

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Anonymous #9 12w

That’s me putting my hand in your face as I am about to ignore you

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