
Could always be both lowkey. It depends on why you can’t use your hand ig. I know someone where it’s a texture thing. Also, the man can use a toy on you. If you’ve had repeat partners/a relationship, he should learn what makes you tick. You deserve to have a good time. If it’s all been one time hookups, it’s very understandable that’s it’s hard for them to get you off, and hard for you to get off, bc you’re probably more worried/insecure (based on personal experience, ignore me if ur different)
it differs from person to person! for me, i find completion fairly fast every single time i use a toy, never by hand (it cramps too soon), and a few times by a guy. i’ve noticed i need some clitoral stimulation (with a toy) or repeated insertion coupled with kissing/physical contact (with a guy). some people don’t need the same degree of clitoral stimulation or have different degrees of sensitivity in the vaginal area so just take the time to figure out what works for you :)
It’s different for different people. There’s an episode of Nip/Tuck where a woman got a clitoral restoration after being mutilated and she thought the surgery failed when really she just wasn’t in the right mind for such things. That’s an extreme but there really is more to it than just stimulation. I used to take my bf to the waterpark all the time but there was one time I sensed a fly in the room and I just could not get into it after that.