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I had an amazing date with a girl and she said before hand that we really connected mentally and in terms of what we’re looking for. She said she had a connection after the date, but not a romantic one. I feel I should have asked her more romantic ques?
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Anonymous 1d

Tbh I don’t think you could have changed it

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Anonymous 1d

She’s probably just not attracted to you physically man, sorry

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Anonymous 15h

I’d guess that there wasn’t chemistry

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Anonymous replying to -> #2 1d

not necessarily, it’s very likely she just realized her feelings were platonic

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Anonymous replying to -> #2 1d

She said she was before the date I think where I messed up is not asking to hold her hand and not asking her more intimate questions, since we had talked about how she was wanting a sub dom dynamic. It just seems really dumb to me that she’d dead the connection when we vibed across the board as she said, minus me not showing enough affection I guess, on our date, so she didn’t feel enough romantic connection

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Anonymous replying to -> OP 1d

Ok yeah bro, if she’s OPENLY telling you that she wants a SEXUAL dynamic, she is giving you the absolute hint of a lifetime to make a move, ESPECIALLY if she’s specifically looking for someone who’s dominant and assertive. She wants someone assertive and bold, and you were kinda a pussy. Learning experience, brush it off and do better next time.

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Anonymous replying to -> #2 1d

Yeah I get it dude I fucked up. I realized that after the date.

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Anonymous replying to -> OP 1d

You asked for advice. Do you want me to sugarcoat the answer, or say exactly what happened so that you can learn from it?

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Anonymous replying to -> #2 1d

calling someone a pussy is rude asf, not sugarcoating ≠ sourcoating

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Anonymous replying to -> #3 1d

Blunt language gets the point across. If the reality of a situation put in harsh language hurts your feelings as a man, then it’s pretty apparent why this happened in the first place

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Anonymous replying to -> #2 1d

I didnt ask you to not sugarcoat it. I understand what you said and I’m not mad. I’m mad at myself and also at her cuz we’re compatible and I didn’t hold her hand or ask her enough intimate questions, and those are things that I think were why she didn’t feel that spark. The convo flowed and she seemed interested besides that. It’s frustrating that some will dead connections over small things like this, but then so many will stay with toxic and or abusive dudes and ignore the red flags

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Anonymous replying to -> OP 1d

I get what you mean man, but it really just isn’t that deep. She just wasn’t that into you on the date, and that’s common. Most people aren’t compatible with most others, and there’s gonna be a lot of trial and error. I understand the frustration seeing other women staying with shitty dudes, but do not go down the path of attributing the behavior of individuals as a generalization of the behavior of women. That’s a fast track to the incel pipeline. Just brush it off, and learn from it.

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