Ask Women on Yik Yak | my bf lives 7 hours away and i have today off until sunday. he is contemplating ending things but said he still isn’t sure bc he does love me and blah blah blah but just wants to talk to me, do I go so we can talk in person?

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Ask Women 1w

my bf lives 7 hours away and i have today off until sunday. he is contemplating ending things but said he still isn’t sure bc he does love me and blah blah blah but just wants to talk to me, do I go so we can talk in person?

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Anonymous 1w

You should 100% talk in person but at this point it doesn’t seem like he’s willing to put in the effort assuming that the reason he’s breaking up is distance. Actual love doesn’t have a range limit. But if there’s a different reason for the break up let us know the people want to know

Anonymous 1w

The fact that he has thought about breaking up is just a red flag to me. Yall should def talk it out, but i would prolly get out of that relationship if i were you. If he really loved you there wouldn’t be any reason to break up. I personally would not want to drive 7 hours to be broken up with though, so maybe FaceTime or video call as an alternative to save you the trip. I would hate to do it all virtually as well, but in this situation it would make your life a little easier.

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Anonymous 1w

i’m assuming he is putting in some sort of effort for this if he isn’t the one coming to you? is he paying for ur flight?

Anonymous

themostcuriouswanderer 1w

he says he needs to focus on his sport because it’s his last year. im apparently affecting his mental health bc he did some questionable things throughout our relationship which caused me to lose trust and so now i have lost that trust but am slowly trying to bring it back. i want to stay with him and work on this but i dont think he does

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Anonymous

OP 1w

Honestly and it’s cliche as fuck but If you love him you gotta let him go at this point. If it’s meant to be he’ll come back. I can kinda imagine the kind of relationship it is and I see how your brain is a little addicted to him at this point but it’s reaching that point where you just need to rip off the bandaid since he clearly isn’t ready to put in effort

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Anonymous

#2 1w

My only fear for her with that is the chance of regretting not going in person thinking forever that if she had just done that there might’ve been some chance to do something more or something

Anonymous

themostcuriouswanderer 1w

See thats also a fair point though. Its just a really tough situation to deal with overall.

Anonymous

themostcuriouswanderer 1w

I agree and that’s exactly what I was thinking of. Should I just explain why I still want to be with him and love him? Or is there anything specific I should say to try to help this situation?

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Anonymous

OP 1w

Let us know why you want to be with him. But he’s just seemingly not ready for something like this right now and will only hurt you by continuing to try. You could remain his friend or in contact with him. I think the best thing to do for yourself is to essentially remind him you’re a person with feelings too but phrase it better than that of course because like. Well I’m not sure if he’s purely being selfish or if he wants to end things to spare you potential emotional suffering

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Anonymous

twirling_tornado 1w

It sounds like the guy is completely checked out at this point and just trying to end it so I doubt it

Anonymous

OP 1w

My other thought is would he drive the 7 hours to talk with you or is he trying to burden you with the drive because he doesn’t want to put in the effort?