Anonymous #2 4w

So… give advance warning? Like “hey, I’m bringing flowers when I scoop you, but don’t let it go to your head or anything, we still aren’t dating-dating, just thought they’d look nice in your place”? Like that sounds a little awkward, but then what DOES that look like in practice?

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Anonymous #3 4w

Same. Mine buys me food, we had a miscommunication he thought I didn’t want to have sex but he was still gonna hang anyways

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Anonymous OP 4w

“Hey, got you something for your place. Wanted to make you feel appreciated, don’t want you to feel like I’m just using you for the benefits.” Tbh it sounds awkward no matter what but I think that’s how I would like to be approached.

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Anonymous #2 4w

I think you gotta be prepared for the fact that there’s a large chunk of women who would be really hurt by this and it has the potential for things to get really messy. This sounds fucked up but at a certain level fwb is basically using the other person for the benefits. I think this idea is clearly really well-intended but for me this would read as mixed signals: a clearly romantic gesture like flowers or whatever followed by saying you don’t want a relationship is kind of like 1/

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Anonymous #5 4w

Essentially crossing that boundary and then saying that’s not what you’re doing, and tbh for some people it might even feel a bit insulting. Again you seem like a good dude and I don’t think this is your intent, but this is the kinda stuff where you want to make people feel good short term but long term has a high probability of getting somebody hurt pretty bad

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Anonymous #5 4w

Like tbh I’m very surprised by the number of women saying you should do this because the chances of this being confusing and potentially hurtful to the other person are pretty high

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Anonymous #5 4w

which is why, as a girl in a fwb situation, are telling this guy to tell her “hey, we’re still friends. I don’t just want you for your body.” Fwb ≠ fuckbuddy. There was probably some level of friendship beforehand and this guy seems like he wants to keep it, which I find sweet and endearing. If my fwb did it for me, I would feel greatly appreciated.

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Anonymous #2 4w

I get all that, I’m not saying that’s not the case for some people. But there’s also a lot of people for whom this crosses the line into the territory of stuff one does for a partner and that would really blur those boundaries even if verbally they say otherwise, and OP needs to be realistic about that.

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