
recoveringincel
Is it wrong to have racial preferences in dating and to articulate said preferences?There’s a fine line between a preference & fetishization. You can have a preference for blondes, for instance, but if you prefer blondes bc you think they’re dumb & you find that hot, you’re in fetishization territory. You’ve selected your partner bc you have a hard on for a stereotype, not bc you love the person. The problem with people who complain about not being able to have a “preference,” is that they probably have a fetish, but aren’t willing to understand why that’s bad.
While I see what everyone is saying about having racial preferences being rooted in racism, personally, I would say I have more of cultural preferences. Or atleast maybe I have racial preferences because of culture and my family. Anyways I’d like to add that if I were single and looking to date, I would still date out of my own race but would prefer not to because it would be easier for my partner and I to understand each others families and traditions. But again everyone is different
It’s literally only about how you come to those preferences. Is there depth to it? Are there literally zero circumstances that would ever lead you to date them? How much prejudice do you carry with it? Lotta people here acting like this isn’t strong culture in the black community as well; to preserve race
OP, don’t listen to these people. A core requirement of being racist is the belief of superiority of one human over another based on race. You aren’t racist, just curious. That being said, it is wrong to tell a person you aren’t attracted to them because of their race. That statement would be unnecessarily rude. It’s better to say you aren’t attracted to that person and keep it at that.
and also you aren't born inherently attracted to one race, thats just not how it works. you're conditioned by your surroundings. white people who grow up in black spaces tend to me more attracted to black people, and black people who grew up in white spaces tend to me attracted to white people. those r okay! however, if your preferences is just based on racial stereotypes, then thats not okay and you should do some soul searching on why that may be.
like how you literally said you like big booty latinas, and i'm almost willing to bet money the reason you don't like black women is due to the stereotypes around them being "loud" or "overweight" and "ghetto" not bc you're actually physically not attracted to them. since there is no way you possibly have seen every single black woman in the world.
and how are we supposed to know that? you're using latinas as a monolith, and not specifying a specific person. you found a specific latina attractive, doesn't mean all latinas everywhere look like her. in fact latinas are probably the most diverse ethnicity out there. there r white latinas, black latinas, asian latinas, the list goes on.
like if u put outside of a racial context, if person A was really into blondes and only started dating person B bc they were blonde and then person B dyed their hair brown and person A dumped them bc they were no longer blonde. imagine how that would make person B feel? that they were only liked by A bc of their hair color.
not really? person A was so superficial that they couldn't manage to love someone for who they are. physically beauty fades. yes it will bring you in, but if something as simple as a hair color manages to make you lose all attraction to your partner means you never loved them in the first place.
say you ended up dating that pretty latina girl u were referring too earlier. honestly lets say u guys get married, and 40 years from now after a couple of kids, she's old. has lost her youthful glow, her hair is short and gray, and she's gained some weight im her old age. are u gonna divorce her bc you're not physically attracted to her anymore??
probably! you're only lusting after women, dating and actively being in a relationship is more than just sex. sex when you're in love is very different than sex when you're horny and looking for a quick fuck. you can have preferences, hell i prefer latino men and im dating one right now but im not only dating him bc he's latino.
I’m not assuming. I’ve never been attracted to an Indian. I have seen loads and they just do not have any attributes that are attractive to me. I’m attracted to blonde haired, blue or green eyed tall men with freckles. What Indian do you know who is this because that’s a new one for me
Bc I’m ngl from your reputation you base your personality on what gets attention. Your true self gets hidden bc deep down women don’t like it which is why you express it online bc there’s no one to come at you physically. You even said you don’t talk to girls outside of yikyak. Is that out of fear, intimidation, or fear of being outed
You know that’s not how that works right? You can’t say your true self and you use an online persona that’s racist. Bc your true self still has a type and your type is rooted in discrimination. But having an online persona that’s racist and sexist does not get attention in fact it makes you look like a loser that can’t respectfully express feelings without being an asshole
You can vote one thing yet still have beliefs on the other side. Plenty of men have voted Dem in the past election bc they simply know voting MAGA isn’t a good idea but also the fact that looking back at it, women did not respect the men that did, bc of what was at stake. You still uphold patriarchal views despite your voting preference. Saying women aren’t strong and feed off women’s anger, while being discriminatory when women are specifically fighting against it is contradicting
Words equal morals and beliefs. For a history nerd you’re truly a dumbass in how you word shit knowing what you do is racist and sexist in intent. You should know that what you say is racist and sexist if you love history so much bc of how women and minorities were treated historically
Yet you voted Dem. Crazy how you contradict yourself all the time and “love women”, but are racist and sexist to every woman that isn’t someone you want to fuck. I thought you were trying to “be better”. You’re still not oppressed as the most privileged race and gender of America
So why is it a problem? If I don’t want to date a non-white then it doesn’t affect you. It’s not racist babes. And jobs that want a bachelors degree will say kindly ‘thank you for your application but we are moving forwards without yours.’. Making it about race is your own issue and im quite happy dating white men that are in my attraction scale
Yo, so it isn’t your fault that you grew up in a culture w Eurocentric beauty standards. Finding euro/white traits attractive in and of itself isn’t a bad thing. It’s when you refuse to acknowledge that those preferences COULD be rooted in racism, while also outright saying that you could never find other racial traits attractive, AND repeatedly saying that this has NOTHING to do with race, is where you start to look bad. I ain’t saying you’re racist, but like— chill out.
except the difference is porn is in a sexual context, your mind is so sex riddled you see a women dressed provocatively and immediately put in a sexual context. what you said perfectly supports what 15 said. a woman taking s picture in a bikini or crop top isn't inherently sexual.
The implication is to be cognizant of sociocultural impacts on peoples’ perceptions of attractiveness, to not objectify or fetishize people based on their race and/or physical characteristics, and to also not scream to the rooftops what aspects you personally find hot.