Yik Yak icon
Join communities on Yik Yak Download
I love this girl I’m dating she’s sweet and funny, smart, but my god it feels like I’m the first non white guy she’s dated. She’ll say stuff like “I’m turning Asian, I just got more rice!”, “hip hop is too black for me” or “7-11 owners should sell Indian-
upvote 42 downvote

default user profile icon
Anonymous 4d

I honestly can’t deal with people like that and would break up but I’m not you. Maybe try and inform her that she is being racist, even if not trying to

upvote 32 downvote
default user profile icon
Anonymous 4d

-goods from their home country”. I don’t think she’s being intentionally insensitive but like I can’t tell if she kinda assumes anyone who isn’t white isn’t from America. What am I supposed to do here? Do I explain it’s insensitive what she’s saying? Or do I just say nothing and have her learn on her own?

upvote 15 downvote
default user profile icon
Anonymous 4d

That’s definitely uncomfortable and I’d say something just like hey babe maybe u shouldn’t say stuff like that Ik u don’t mean to but it can come off tone deaf

upvote 10 downvote
default user profile icon
Anonymous 3d

yeah no leave her

upvote 5 downvote
default user profile icon
Anonymous 3d

You need to sit her down and tell her why those things are racist. And if she can’t accept that then you need to leave her

upvote 1 downvote
default user profile icon
Anonymous replying to -> #1 4d

Here’s the thing- she was born in Louisiana and we met in our north eastern university. Her family is deeply entrenched in a maga specific area even if they identify as left/ apolitical people. And given the kinds of educational laws in that area, I almost doubt any of what she says is intentional. So is it racist? No. But is it still exhausting to listen to? One hundred percent

upvote 9 downvote
default user profile icon
Anonymous replying to -> #2 4d

I have. She’ll ask why it’s hurtful cause to her it just makes sense like saying “the sky is blue” or “whales swim in the ocean”.

upvote 5 downvote
default user profile icon
Anonymous replying to -> OP 4d

You can be unintentionally racist. Doesn’t mean you’re an evil horrible person, just that you absorbed certain messages. Do you think she would take it well if you told her these comments make you uncomfortable?

upvote 29 downvote
default user profile icon
Anonymous replying to -> #3 4d

Oh nvm I just read your other comments. Yeah idk what advice to give, having to explain these things sounds exhausting. Maybe there’s some media out there that you can find and show her to help her understand. Like podcasts, video essays, books, etc

upvote 6 downvote
default user profile icon
Anonymous replying to -> #3 4d

Either way she should want to learn more if you express that it’s important to you that she does so

upvote 5 downvote
default user profile icon
Anonymous replying to -> OP 4d

I’m white and that stuff would have me tired and annoyed and wanting to roll my eyes

upvote 21 downvote
default user profile icon
Anonymous replying to -> #4 4d

And my family has said not quite that but close enough. But I feel like I still spent enough time around other people not like that and even online to become my own person and have that stuff drive me crazy idk

upvote 12 downvote