Anonymous #1 7w

what an ignorant comment. she’s obviously referring to being lusted over for her body, not desired because of her mind / personality

6

Anonymous hellraiser 7w

Women are very tone deaf about these things. Be a man for 1 day and you’ll realize that even being lusted over is preferable to your existence barely being acknowledged.

-5

Anonymous #1 7w

I see your dms are open, I’m going to send you some of the dms I used to get when I would post outfit checks

5

Anonymous forget_me_not 7w

Then you tell me if you’d rather be ignored or listed over

2

Anonymous forget_me_not 7w

*lusted

2

Anonymous forget_me_not 7w

By all means.

0

Anonymous forget_me_not 7w

I don’t think it’s necessarily and “man vs woman” thing, but the opposite sides of the attraction scale come with vastly different life experiences, I’m sure it’s annoying to have people covet you only for your appearance, but on the other side of things conventionally unattractive or unappealing ppl get treated like a literal waste of space especially when they’re women

6

Anonymous forget_me_not 7w

I think 1 was just pointing out that there’s a basic human need for validation and everyone wants to feel that others find them attractive. But attractive people don’t really hurt for that, they have a surplus of it

5

Anonymous #3 7w

But that’s not the point of the post. The post was talking about being LUSTED over. Lust and desire are different. To be lusted is to be treated as an object to fulfill sexual desire. It is not exclusive to “conventionally attractive” people.

5

Anonymous #1 7w

just because not being acknowledged at all sucks, or is worse doesn’t mean it doesn’t suck to only be desired for your body. you’re sounding tone deaf yourself if you think the presence of someone’s struggles eliminates someone else’s. it’s like if you were complaining about being an unattractive, undesirable, unlikable incel and someone came on your post saying “god you able bodied ppl are so tone deaf, my life is worse because i’m disabled so you can’t complain”

5

Anonymous hellraiser 7w

Being an incel and being disabled have nothing in common. Being desired and not being desired do have something in common.

0

Anonymous #1 7w

do you realize how tone deaf it is to come on someone else’s post to mock them and make it about urself ? whether or not you have it worse has nothing to do with the fact that op also has unique struggles not being desired in the way she wants. we get it, you’re miserable your life sucks no one wants you. this post triggered u bc ur existence revolves around wallowing in pity and spreading your pain. it’s not gonna make you feel any better to bring someone else down

2

Anonymous hellraiser 7w

Wrong again, I came on here to humble this person who thinks their existence being acknowledged is somehow a bad thing

-6

Anonymous #1 7w

yeah humbling someone falls under the category of spreading your misery

7

Anonymous forget_me_not 7w

I get that it’s about being lusted over and I get that it sucks when ppl only want you for one thing. But imo it’s complaining about something that generally makes your life easier and I’m sure at some point you can use to your advantage. I’m not saying it’s not dehumanizing cuz obviously it is I’m only saying that maybe I’d last a little longer in your shoes than you would in mine.

-1

Anonymous forget_me_not 7w

& i could be wrong but i think it’s exclusive to attractive people especially on larger scales. Being lusted over and being fetishized are similar but still different things

-1

Anonymous #3 7w

this ain’t the struggle olympics jesus yall are miserable

4

Anonymous hellraiser 7w

😂I’m actually pretty happy with myself i just know what I’m working with and where I stand in society. You’re quick to call someone tone deaf but are only willing to accept your own perspective and tear down the other

1

Anonymous #3 7w

i’m not tearing down anyone’s perspective. and op and i don’t even have the same perspective. i just have this thing called empathy where i can recognize the validity of someone else’s struggle even if it is different than my own. yall seem to be lacking that

3

Anonymous hellraiser 7w

I’ve recognized the validity of your struggles being lusted over multiple times. I just have this thing called reading comprehension where I can also recognize when someone is being intentionally insulting and belittling

3

Anonymous #3 7w

You recognized it while still belittling it and comparing two different struggles.

4

Anonymous forget_me_not 7w

I compared the two but I didn’t belittle it at all. To say I think one experience might be more difficult than the other is not belittling it

2

Anonymous #3 7w

You did though. “But… it makes your life easier” it really doesn’t make lives easier. To say that one experience is more or less difficult than the other is to belittle someone’s general experience with what they struggle with. The comparison is belittling in itself. If someone broke their arm and I said “well I broke my foot and that hurts a lot, you shouldn’t complain about breaking your arm when I have to wear a boot and wear crutches”. They both suck. Dehumanizing is the first step toward

2

Anonymous forget_me_not 7w

Overall separation and further alienation of each party. Someone telling me being lusted over makes my life easier makes me more inclined to ignore any person that looks at me, which would further exacerbate their feeling of being unseen

0

Anonymous #5 7w

They’re feeling after only being listed after like an object.

6

Anonymous forget_me_not 7w

I think I see where you might be feeling belittled by what I said, but I disagree that comparison in itself is belittling. The ppl with broken bones are both in pain, but they’re in different pain that impedes them in different ways. & I can understand what you mean but my statement wasn’t that being lusted over makes life easier it’s the things that LEAD to being lusted over that ca be seen as a social advantage, the lust is an unfortunate byproduct of that.

2

Anonymous #3 7w

You’re moving the goal post and I can see where you think that’s a valid response, but the words you said were, and I quote “it’s complaining about something that generally makes your life easier and I’m sure at done point you can use to your advantage” who’s is belittling. You’re saying someone who has every right to complain shouldn’t because of how YOU perceive their life to be easier. You’re refusing to acknowledge that it sucks to be lusted over.

0

Anonymous forget_me_not 7w

I think you’re just ignoring where i acknowledge it and focusing on what offends you. I stand by what I said, I’m just explaining it. I do see where you’re coming from tho tbh I came at this in a self centered way

2

Anonymous #3 7w

Yeah don’t mind them they’re pretty closed minded evidently

-1

Anonymous #3 7w

I’m glad you’re acknowledging where you were in the wrong. You were focusing on yourself and not empathizing or recognizing what we were saying. Glad something got across.

-1

Anonymous forget_me_not 7w

💀I actually am taking something away from this, I just see that you’re not so there’s no point in trying to bring perspective where it’s unwanted and unwelcome

1

Anonymous #3 7w

Good

0

Anonymous hellraiser 6w

Hellraiser is right

1

Anonymous #3 6w

I’ve been on both sides of the spectrum and one isn’t better but worse

1

Anonymous #7 6w

One isn’t better or worse

1

Anonymous #3 6w

telling a woman that being lusted over makes her life easier is absolutely insane. I don’t think men like you understand the sheer FEAR women go through every day when being approached by lustful men with bad intentions, that shit is so scary it doesn’t make your life “better” like wow men are so clueless 😭

1