Ask Women on Yik Yak | Dumb question probably, but dating gives me (M) probably way too much anxiety, but it is real. But I feel dumb talking to my friends (a lot of whom are women) about it just cause it should be so simple. Nobody else in my circle has this much of a problem>

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Ask Women 16w

Dumb question probably, but dating gives me (M) probably way too much anxiety, but it is real. But I feel dumb talking to my friends (a lot of whom are women) about it just cause it should be so simple. Nobody else in my circle has this much of a problem>

Anonymous 16w

like should I trust in them to tell me when they’ve heard enough about it? I just worry they don’t want to hear about it, but at the same time it’s my emotions. And yes before you say I do also talk to a therapist, but I also like to talk about my shit with some close friends, especially since they can help me and push me in the real world

Anonymous 16w

Dating is HARD, and it’s absolutely something normal to talk about with your friends. Even if your circle doesn’t have trouble I can assure you a lot of us out here are having immense trouble lol.

Anonymous 16w

It’s okay to feel anxious. Dating can be hard especially if you aren’t sure how to talk to ppl or like talking to ppl in general all that much

Anonymous

#1 16w

Yeah I know a lot of people have trouble, but at least amongst people I know I’m the only one who has never been in a relationship. But it’s sucks, I have such an easy time socializing and meeting people but as soon as I have any romantic intentions it really starts to stress me out, and it rubs off and shows in how I act. I’m pretty sure my nerves have turned some girls off of me

Anonymous

#1 16w

So idk how to bridge that gap. I love talking to strangers even, but once I’m into someone I can’t act natural anymore

Anonymous

OP 16w

I know several friends who haven’t had a relationship and they’re very social and attractive too. Dating is honest to god a lot about sheer luck + as u said romance can just be stressful.

Anonymous

#1 16w

It just sucks I feel like I’m not living a well rounded life. I’m trying to put myself out there, but I’m not even expecting something serious to just come my way. I just want to have some life experiences yk like I’m in my 20s I want the good and the bad, I want to relate to my friends when they talk about sex and dating, I want to have stories and live and learn about myself

Anonymous

OP 16w

Yeah I totally get that. I’m sorry you’re the only one in your group I know how isolating that can feel, but know that you are not actually alone in the grand scheme of things. Keep on being you and meeting new people. I believe what’s good for you will come to be, you seem like a very nice person.

Anonymous

#1 16w

Thank you 🥹

Anonymous

#1 16w

I try my best

Anonymous

#1 16w

Do you have any specific advice? Like there are some things I do think I’ve done wrong, mainly waiting too long to say anything and being over apologetic about myself, so I need to fix that, but like anything else?

Anonymous

OP 16w

I think those are good things to work on. I wish I could give you more specific advice but I don’t really know you enough to know how you act in terms of dating. Are you one to make the first move much?

Anonymous

#1 16w

I don’t make a move enough probably, but when I have it’s only ever been me making the first move

Anonymous

#1 16w

I haven’t gotten past sounding nervous when I do it though

Anonymous

OP 16w

That’s okay, its definitely nerve wracking but I’d say don’t let your nerves stop you. If you see someone you’re interested in, just do it even if it’s out your comfort zone a little bit. If it works out awesome, if not well then good practice at least.

Anonymous

#1 16w

I feel like when I’m out the girls are all in groups. How should I navigate that?

Anonymous

OP 16w

That’s true, ik im usually out with a group of friends. Still, guys will approach one of us when we’re out. It’s also a plus if you’re out with other guy friends and y’all can talk as a group.

Anonymous

#1 16w

At least at college I have more girl friends, although not a solid group that I tend to go out with. At home I have a group of mostly guy friends, but obviously we’re not all together so much anymore

Anonymous

#1 16w

Do they come by and talk to everyone? When/how do they start isolating you individually?

Anonymous

OP 16w

Maybe ask some of your girl friends if they can help introduce you to girls when you’re out?

Anonymous

OP 16w

Some talk to everyone, some just start off talking to them only. I always think it’s nice to acknowledge everyone esp if it’s a relatively smaller group, but then you can kinda shift the conversation to the one person and others will probably naturally dwindle into their own convos. Or if you notice that she looks bored / not talking to the rest of the group that could be a good time to say hi.

Anonymous

#1 16w

Yeah that’s the goal. One of my best friends is a coworker and we sometimes go out to bars so she can just hype me up and push me into the deep end, but she’s a few years older than me so doesn’t know many good places for us to go for people my age or can’t really set me up with anyone she knows

Anonymous

#1 16w

The goal is practice in an environment where I know nobody, so we avoid the bars near my school. I looked into college bars for other schools in the city so hopefully that could work

Anonymous

#1 16w

Good point. I think I’m just so eager to get out of this stage of my life

Anonymous

OP 16w

Sounds like a solid plan. Good luck with everything! I get the feeling for sure but remember to enjoy your life in the meantime, you’ll meet your right person eventually.

Anonymous

#1 16w

Thank you!

Anonymous

#1 16w

You’re very kind I wish you nothing but the best!