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Ask Women 15w
i just recently started living with my boyfriend, i went with him tonight to doordash (i asked him if he wanted me to come because i worked all day + tomorrow and wanted to spend some time), after the 1st order he send me back home for alone time —->
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Anonymous 15w

on the car ride back he told me he wants me to “want him” not need him. i just wanted to spend time with him since i will be gone again tomorrow. not sure how to feel about the situation

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Anonymous 15w

Not sure I understand. Which of you was more excited/invested about you riding along while he doordashed?

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Anonymous 15w

Trying to understand if the issue is him seeing you as clingy

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Anonymous replying to -> #1 15w

we went to eat and then he brought up the idea of doordashing, i asked him if he wanted me to ride since we were already out (i asked this multiple times to make sure he wanted me going because him needing alone time has been a conversation recently) and he said yes, after one order he said “ i’m having trouble sharing space, i’m gonna take you home”

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Anonymous replying to -> OP 15w

Honestly it sounds like you’re both doing your best to articulate your wants and needs and space, and not getting it right the first time. But sometimes that’s part of the process. Hopefully next time he can introspect a little more and tell at the beginning if he needs to ask for alone time.

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Anonymous replying to -> #1 15w

Based on limited info, it may be that you want to spend a lot of time together (and maybe feel anxious if apart? Idk) while he needs alone time to recharge (I’m like that too, it’s very normal for some people).

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Anonymous replying to -> #1 15w

Maybe you value a lot of time together, while he mainly values what he sees as quality time together. Personally I’d rather spend the workday apart and come together for a more focused time together when work is done.

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