Anonymous #1 4w

I tried really hard to express that I don’t judge any women for their weight and know how difficult weight loss is. I’m not trying to throw shade or piss anyone off. I know weight comments can hurt women really badly but I also know height comments can hurt men really badly. I came here for a honest discussion, that’s all. Could you please leave out the ad hominem attacks?

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Anonymous OP 4w

And I’m shortish, I’m 5’8. My gf’s dad is 5’4 and told me that people really do take it upon themselves to joke about his appearance all the time. Yes he’s a grown man but it still hurts being mocked for something you can’t control. I’m just wondering what y’all’s take is on why one topic is taboo and the other isn’t.

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Anonymous #2 4w

Yeah I’d agree. Why do you think one is acceptable though? My guess is that in the grand scheme of things men have cast far more stones towards women than vice versa so now it’s sort of expected that men should let this one go and just suck it up. I’m not even saying it’s wrong necessarily, that’s just my guess. What’s your take though?

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Anonymous OP 4w

I think that’s probably a big part of it. Also, women have really rallied to combat fatphobia and promote body acceptance, whereas there hasn’t been that kind of movement from men about height (probably for the same reason you described, the issue isn’t quite as overt/widespread) I’d also say that fat people face more discrimination/obstacles in society than short people, making fatphobia a more sore subject overall

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Anonymous #2 4w

Ok yeah that makes sense, fatphobia does seem like more of an issue. Do you think there is any way men could promote this specific aspect of body acceptance? Don’t wanna sound too ‘woe is me’ cause I have it pretty good overall but I’m ngl it does hurt my feelings to be made fun of for something I can’t control. I’d imagine it stings somewhat like how it stings for a bigger woman to read a joke made at the expense of overweight women.

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Anonymous OP 4w

And thanks for the real answer I really appreciate it

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Anonymous OP 4w

I think in general men need to figure out non-toxic ways to unite and advocate for themselves/each other. Another example is the male loneliness issue—instead of blaming women and society and isolating further (like some do, and there are different levels to this), they need to build bonds, or even get a movement going to foster conversations and communities. I also think positive male role models are huge (In this case representation of short men as strong/compassionate/confident/etc)

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Anonymous #2 4w

Theoretically I get you but do you have any insight into how that would work practically? Any time a short man tries to express how this is hurtful it’s met with ridicule and hatred. Or often anyway, shouldn’t make sweeping statements like that. Even here I was super intentional about trying to have a respectful discussion abt this and the first response I got was someone telling me I was some single insecure loser. Is there a better way men could frame this issue?

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Anonymous OP 4w

Like as a short guy how could someone express that this sort of thing hurts their feelings and have it taken seriously?

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Anonymous OP 4w

That’s the questions, isn’t it Movements often take inspiration from previous movements, so it’d be worth looking at the body acceptance movement for strategies I think it’s gonna take some brave men being openly/publicly earnestly vulnerable about their experiences (with as little bitterness as possible). Those examples might inspire others to band with them or stop shaming others. Like I said I also think role models and representation are important (in schools, media, culture, etc)

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