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Ask Women 17h
Is making fun of men that are romantically and sexually unsuccessful perpetuating toxic masculinity and patriarchal standards
#poll
Yes
No
81 votes
comment

15
upvote 5 downvote
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Anonymous 17h

yeah but i think if their intention is to point out that their lack of romantic/ sexual success unsuccessful because of shitty character traits completely within their control it’s a little more valid. making fun of virgins just bc they haven’t had sex is a bitch move. it’s shaming based on the belief that a man’s worth is tied to his ability to have sex with women, & that ties into societal beliefs abt masculinity equating to dominance and sexual conquest.

upvote 15 downvote
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Anonymous 15h

I completely agree with raiser. Making fun of a man who’s having trouble with dating is shitty. Pointing out why he may be having problems is not though, especially if they ask for feedback.

upvote 8 downvote
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Anonymous 15h

Depends on why he’s unsuccessful. Simply just not having success is normal for literally everyone. Someone likely has had the exact same experience you have had. The man that deliberately are pieces of shit to ppl that correlate to their lack of success and push that pain and idiocy on to other ppl not so much. They wouldn’t get the same leniency or compassion. At least from me

upvote 4 downvote
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Anonymous 2h

perhaps it may be. however, im of the belief that it is usually men making fun of other men that are romantically and sexually unsuccessful. i believe it is other men that perpetuate majority of toxic masculinity and wanting to uphold patriarchy

upvote 1 downvote
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Anonymous replying to -> hellraiser 17h

OK, so let me ask you this do you think most men that are unsuccessful romantically and sexually are unsuccessful because they’re shitty people?

upvote -1 downvote
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Anonymous replying to -> OP 16h

no i don’t think that majority are shitty ppl at all. i think more likely it’s because a lot of people have trouble connecting with others, and they struggle with social and physical aspects related to attracting people

upvote 7 downvote
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Anonymous replying to -> hellraiser 16h

That is post hoc rationalizing it’s not logical like you seem to think

upvote -2 downvote
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Anonymous replying to -> #2 16h

no i don’t think so. can you elaborate

upvote 1 downvote
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Anonymous replying to -> #2 16h

do you mean when i said that it’s more valid to make fun of them when their personality traits are the reason for their lack of success ? do you not think that’s the case for some ppl ? not saying it’s the only reason. but it definitely factors in.

upvote 6 downvote
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Anonymous replying to -> hellraiser 16h

You don’t know that their personality is the reason it is an assumption. What if their lack of success results in a behavior change that you a person who comes along later down the line perceives as bad. Attributing their lack of success to a personality change that is the result of failure is post hoc rationalizing.

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Anonymous replying to -> #2 15h

oh i’m sure it can be cyclical like that. and ur right, no one can know for sure the exact reasoning that someone struggles with dating/ sex. i even said in my other comment that it’s not all just personality flaws. i’m just saying if idk any other context besides knowing they’re an incel and they’re acting like an incel… (misogynistic hateful etc) im not gonna feel bad about telling them to get their personality in check, and calling them an incel.

upvote 9 downvote
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Anonymous replying to -> hellraiser 15h

Seems we agree then

upvote 1 downvote
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Anonymous replying to -> #4 15h

How often is the latter happening in comparison to the former?

upvote 1 downvote
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Anonymous replying to -> OP 14h

That I cannot tell you since it’s usually men enabling it and I’m not a man to attest to that. Which I can say upholds the patriarchy and most ppl of the same sex are just bullying others of the same sex and creating the “incel” effect

upvote 1 downvote
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Anonymous replying to -> #5 2h

so like yes if women add onto it of course, but i think a man values another man’s opinion more and as soon as it is seen as “embarrassing” to not have luck romantically and sexually, men hold more value on that opinion if it comes from another man

upvote 1 downvote