Anonymous #1 12w

100% this, coming from a fat and generally unattractive autistic chick. (Like, ugly to the point where I’m entering my mid-20s having never even been on a date before) Pretty privilege is 100% a real thing.

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Anonymous #1 12w

this!! having pretty privilege when being autistic is easier than being autistic and ugly. people are more likely to give you a chance if you’re pretty vs. when you’re ugly

5

Sorry I didn’t explain it well because my cat wanted attention. There was a point due to the discomfort from being hit on that I gained a lot of weight. However, I ended up loosing it because the social treatment was so different. So I used to feel that way, but having experienced the other side of it made me appreciate it more. Being hot is an asset even if it sucks.

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Anonymous #8 12w

/g

3

I don’t because it’s an advantage and keeps me from upsetting people by mistake.

1

Fuck no, take that shit an run. Don’t end up like us.

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Anonymous #8 12w

I mean I guess if people flirt with you or ask you out? I’ve never had either happen to me to assume I’m like a step up from Demi Moore at the end of The Substance lol

2

Anonymous #3 12w

Oh! Also: getting complimented on your appearance rather than your clothes/jewelry/items on you rather than your actual self. Like, I’ve only gotten compliments on my actual physical attributes twice in my life.

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Anonymous #8 12w

Generally, it’s cultural, regional, and personal preference. I’m about to talk about some of the research I have read so keep in mind this is heteronormative and based on cis males and females. Worldwide, there are 2 traits that are found to be attractive in women across all cultures. The first being hips wider than the waist. The second being younger looking.

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Anonymous #7 12w

So when applying this to real people, think rounder faces as someone would look younger for longer, hourglass glass body types, triangular body types, and larger butts

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Anonymous #7 12w

damn so everyone’s a pedophile

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Anonymous #3 12w

what even is flirting😭 i’m sure people have flirted with u and u wouldn’t even know

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Anonymous #8 12w

I’m a fat, gnc (thanks, neuroendocrine disorder!) disabled woman. I don’t even have people who come up to me wanting to be my *friend*, let alone fucking flirt. Please don’t assume you know people. (/nm)

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Anonymous #8 12w

No, wider hips are usually developed around 2nd puberty. Younger features just means pre menopausal. Pedophilic attraction can be caused by a multitude of reasons that can be very triggering to discuss.

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Anonymous #3 12w

have people told u ur not attractive or is that just ur perception /g like what have people done or said i don’t understand

1

Anonymous #8 12w

I have only ever been asked out on a date as a joke or a dare. I have never been called “pretty” or “beautiful”, even by my own family. I have been called so many transphobic things so many times that I’ve lost count (aforementioned gender nonconformity due to a medical condition) and the few that respond upon correction say that no one could ever like something as ugly as me. So yeah.

2

Anonymous #3 12w

#3, I have some information that may be helpful towards building self confidence outside of beauty standards if you would be interested.

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Anonymous #7 12w

But not *too big* for any of them, and on conventional bodies. I meet a lot of these criteria but people won’t touch me with a ten foot pole.

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Anonymous #7 12w

Like what, if you don’t mind me asking? I know I have confidence issues, but it’s more the result of a society never willing to accept me. I’ve been in therapy for over a decade, I currently see 2 different therapists a week, have exhausted most antidepressants (SSRIs, SNRIs, TCAs, *and* MAOIs), & attempted just about every way of forming relationships both irl and online.

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Anonymous #3 12w

Unless I get some sort of skeletal reconstruction procedure that doesn’t exist yet (I’ll never not be plus sized with my current height/build), or your advice is a tutorial on how to tie a noose, I’m cooked. Plain and simple.

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Anonymous #3 12w

You can psychologically condition yourself to like the way you look for reasons other than it being considered attractive. I did that because basing my self confidence off of what straight men like is bad for mental health

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Anonymous #3 12w

You’re probably just going to need to be friends with other autistic people / adhd people who miss a lot of social cues. Very direct communication should be established early on

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Anonymous #3 12w

that sounds really hard honestly and i’m sorry for the way people have treated u when it’s really a reflection of themselves and how sick of a person they are

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