Anonymous #1 1d

fr here i was thinking it wasn’t supposed to be transactional but based on love my bad

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Anonymous #2 1d

Women end up doing a disproportionate amount of household, emotional, and social labor

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Anonymous #4 1d

What’s social labor?

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Anonymous #2 1d

Married men statistically make 10-40% more than unmarried men, have a significantly higher chance of receiving promotions, have longer lifespans, significantly lower rates of cardiovascular disease and suicide, lower inflammation, lower rates of depression, etc etc etc

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Anonymous OP 1d

Look it up if you want more

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Anonymous #1 1d

This is in no way a life approach lmao, I'm just reporting the cold hard data/facts

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Anonymous #3 1d

It absolutely is, I'm just so over seeing men nonstop talking about how awful marriage is for men and how much better women have it, because it's simply blatant misinformation They mean that women have it better in regard to divorce Js though, marriage was in no way originally created to be about 'love' lmao

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Anonymous OP 1d

I don’t think that getting married gives you a better paying job tho. I think men are more likely to get married if they have a stable job. I’ma check real quick to see that same statistic for women and if its not then you might be onto something

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Anonymous OP 1d

I checked it and it seems to account for the motherhood penalty which means adjustment for disparities caused by motherhood

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Anonymous OP 1d

When is it a thing for women to be reputably better at marriage than men? Is that like a common stereotype?

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Anonymous #2 1d

There’s multiple definitions (like one on a societal level and another on a personal level) but basically the work done to maintain relationships with others in the community.

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Anonymous #4 1d

And that’s considered labor?

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Anonymous OP 1d

I did the math for the motherhood penalty and while women do seem to make lower wages compared to men in caregiving roles with 60-70% of caregiving fathers earning less than unmarried men compared to 70-80% of caregiver mothers earning lower wages than unmarried women, it does seem more of a role thing than anything. Like would it account for relationships of gay men sorted into laborer/caregiver dynamics?

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Anonymous #2 1d

Trying to coordinate with the other’s family, play dates, remembering occasions and preferences, etc. can be difficult. Labor isn’t inherently a bad thing, but overtime things can add up and get stressful.

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Anonymous #2 1d

The original statistic is that they make more than single men, not women, due to a variety of factors!! Such as the fact that they're more likely to be promoted than unmarried men. But you do bring up a good point, maybe some of that's due to men who already have a lot of pull at work tend to get married more! And I'd bet (I'm assuming on this one) that married gay men don't make more than their single counterparts. But I can def be wrong

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Anonymous OP 1d

I’m also curious cuz the majority of reports I found that did result in identifying lower wages for married women seemed to mainly do with kids so I’m currently looking into if this effect still persists with married couples without kids where there would be less of a caretaker dynamic

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Anonymous #2 1d

That's 100% labor. Even just emotional labor is LABOR. I found that out the hard way lmao I was once in a relationship where 99% of the emotional labor fell on me, and ts was genuinely more exhausting/taxing than my actual soul-crushing, life-consuming job 😭

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Anonymous #4 1d

That makes sense. Would this still persist if the married couple didn’t have kids and would it fluctuate if the couple was unmarried but together?

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Anonymous #2 1d

Oftentimes, yes. An extreme example of this would be the role of a First Lady and it is certainly more pronounced in other cultures (Chinese or Korean for example), but it is still somewhat prevalent in our own. Unmarried women often do forms of social labor but it is normalized in married couples.

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