Anonymous #1 7w

If he was insecure he shouldn’t have been. I did like him and saw his goodness. It was that he didn’t choose anyone at all. He sure as hell won’t get another shot after that

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Anonymous evil_bitch 7w

Normally I hate myself bc I’m ugly, pls let me have this

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Anonymous OP 7w

Covert narcissism is still a thing

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Anonymous evil_bitch 7w

That’s the victim mentality type of narcissism where you think you deserve things because you’re the greatest sufferer

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Anonymous evil_bitch 7w

Well now I def don’t think I deserve anything much less love thank u so much

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Anonymous OP 7w

Yw

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Anonymous #1 7w

Or maybe he just doesn’t care about looks AND he’s not manipulative or insecure. Maybe she just needs to work on herself.

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Anonymous evil_bitch 7w

Let’s not self diagnose ppl. Everyone has narcissistic tendencies to some extent & she feels hurt and insecure about it like… it’s normal. she would be a narcissist if this was a pattern and always having trouble with keeping any kind of genuine relationship like u don’t know everything about her

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Anonymous evil_bitch 7w

I do agree with that too

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Anonymous #1 7w

I have work to do but I’m hurt by the way he handled the situation as I felt valued and now I no longer do

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Anonymous #1 7w

Oh I wasn’t trying to diagnose her. I’m not a psychiatrist. I’m just pointing out narcissistic characteristics, some covert. Whether or not she’s narcissistic is for someone else to determine. She’d had to meet several criteria. I understand that she feels hurt, but she also has to recognize that it’s a toxic mindset. She might be insecure herself.

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Anonymous evil_bitch 7w

I mean she is insecure*** She said it herself. Thats why she places such value on men finding her attractive/male validation. Nobody should be honored because she wants them. She’s not a trophy or some medal.

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Anonymous OP 7w

It’s because you don’t see yourself as valuable. You’re looking to be chosen and it puts you in a spot where you are seeing yourself as a victim like “why am I not good enough for him” “why can’t he see I’m so great” when you should be asking “why does it matter for a guy who doesn’t want me to not like me? I am pretty and I am worthy and I can find someone who matches that and we aren’t a good match”. Like if he doesn’t want you it doesn’t mean you lose value, your value doesn’t depend on him

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Anonymous OP 7w

How did he handle it?

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Anonymous OP 7w

Hey, maybe I’m being more logical can emotional so I’m coming off as cold. I do apologize. I’m just not the type to praise toxicity. Like I would personally want someone to do the same for me. Because I’m always trying to better myself as a person. Maybe you’re still going through the motions rn so you don’t feel like hearing the truth. But at some point you need to. Whether or not you’re receptive is up to you. We all have things that are “wrong” with us. So it’s not personal.

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Anonymous evil_bitch 7w

This post was basically a passing thought in my head that made me feel hot for a few minutes. I’m not walking around treating other women as if they’re beneath me or as if every man should fall at my feet. Maybe my post gave that sort of impression. I’m starting a journey to improve my self image and I felt frustrated with this situation as I liked the guy but he didn’t see me as worth the effort to pursue anything further and it stings. I just want to speak to myself in a way that doesn’t

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Anonymous OP 7w

invalidate my worth but I can do a better job at balancing my self talk with confidence but still humility and not putting myself on a pedestal. I have no desire to do that

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Anonymous OP 7w

I understand

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Anonymous #1 7w

I honestly don’t and have never valued looks which speaks more to the fact I don’t make posts like this much less think this way about myself on a regular basis, I know personality is infinitely more valuable, but like I said it was a passing thought and I didn’t feel ugly and I feel I need to focus more on finding value in the out because I’ve always felt much more secure in the type of person I am and my character

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Anonymous OP 7w

Valued my* looks

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Anonymous OP 7w

Girl, I totally get you. I have many insecurities. So I know where you’re coming from. I’m just at the point in my life where I’m so direct with myself and don’t take anything personally, because at the end of the day I know that I am overcoming my toxic traits. So maybe I replicate this energy with others who potentially aren’t at the same path as me. Again, I apologize for the coldness.

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Anonymous OP 7w

You just said it right there you “feel” ugly not that you look ugly because you know you aren’t ugly. That feeling is your mentality belittling yourself and being hard on yourself probs due to self comparison etc. It’s not that you need to work on yourself as a person and your personality, no. It’s how you perceive yourself that you need to work on. And that can’t be changed with makeup or surgery because that’s inside and most likely due to maybe a past trauma of someone making u feel unworthy

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Anonymous evil_bitch 7w

Maybe instead of expecting men to be honored, respect yourself to be honored because you deserve love, confidence, and respect? Please take care of yourself.

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Anonymous #1 7w

Mhm it usually starts during childhood. Especially with not only how our parents and friends speak to us, but with how they speak about themselves and other people around them. You start to internalize it and assume the same for yourself.

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Anonymous evil_bitch 7w

I don’t expect men to be honored at all sorry I just want to develop myself enough to be capable of having loving relationships romantic or otherwise without feeling so terribly insecure

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Anonymous OP 7w

I completely understand where you’re coming from tbh

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Anonymous evil_bitch 7w

You felt like you have to be extreme just to balance the feelings of insecurity. But what you need is balance, which I know you know. You said it. You just need time to battle this because confidence doesn’t grow overnight.

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Anonymous #1 7w

That wording was unintentional like I don’t know if I’m ugly or not lol and it is self comparison because I’ve never been treated like I am worth the kind of love I seek so that absence manifests in my beliefs that I am not worthy of it and therefore will never have it period

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Anonymous evil_bitch 7w

Right like I either feel disgusting or I’m beautiful and he should be sorry. I don’t feel that latter extreme deep in my soul, it’s like a mask

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Anonymous OP 7w

So real. I’ve done the same thing in the past where I have this very cocky alter ego. It’s like, mmm I could’ve achieved this with having a confident alter ego instead. It’s just harder to build.

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Anonymous OP 7w

I know exactly how you feel. But start to heal that inner part of yourself and do some self care things to see yourself both inside and out in a positive light (doing positive affirmations help) and you should feel better about yourself. Maybe talking to someone u trust about a specific moment you felt unworthy and recognizing how that is not true to who you are now can help

1