I’m really sorry you went through that and still suffer from the after effects from such a traumatic experience, but I still highly encourage you to try to, if you can. I know how intimidating it can be, but opening up helped me a lot, I never realized how much carrying that secret around was weighing on me. I can’t imagine how hard things must have been for you, carrying your secret for this long. Please feel free to dm me if you want to talk about it at all :)