like sir you cannot swipe on me knowing i’m looking for a long term partner and don’t want kids and then give me the best sex and kisses of my life and then leave me with the uncertainty??? literally had the best night like an absolute dream come true and then at the end i stupidly asked him if he wants kids so that’s what we left on and i wish i had waited so i could just savor how good the night was before that. it was like i was in heaven and now all i can think about is heartbreak over kids

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also i asked him his usual type bc he said it wasn’t me and he told me goth women which is basically the complete opposite of me so that’s was awesome. idk why i kept bringing up topics that just hurt my feelings. i don’t know how not to get my own hopes up. i get way too excited way too easily but it’s like no matter how much i try i just can’t avoid it. when i like someone my brain suddenly revolves around them

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