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Confessions icon
Confessions 9w
Ok so here goes: I’ve (25M) been so caught up in being horny and trying to just find a hookup or fwb or whatever I could find that i lost sight of what matters. At the end of the day, I wanna be able to come home to somebody that I can call my own.
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Anonymous 9w

Need this too babe

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Anonymous 9w

Somebody that’s all mine and I’m all theirs. Somebody that wants to listen to how my day went and wants to tell me about theirs. Somebody who I’m the first person they wanna call when something goes really right or really wrong, and vice versa. Somebody that loves me for me and lets me love them for who they are.

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Anonymous 9w

But I want all the lovey dovey stuff too. The cuddles at night and in the morning. The pulling her in closer while I’m still half asleep. The head and beard scratches. The leg rubs while I’m driving just to be touching me and reminding me she’s there. The actually being there when I’m struggling mentally.

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Anonymous 9w

Anywho, that’s my confession. I might add more to it later on. But I just wanted to get all of that off my chest. I hope you all had an amazing day and have a wonderful night and sleep well and wake up well rested. 😴

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Anonymous 9w

And I feel like I need to apologize for going off the straight and narrow, but there’s really nobody to apologize to. Myself? Maybe, idk. Like don’t get me wrong, yea I’m still stupidly horny all the time like any other guy. But I don’t want a bunch of different lovers. I want *my* lover. My personal porn star that only has eyes for me and only shows off for me.

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Anonymous 9w

I actually am in the process of deleting all the porn and porn-adjacent stuff I had saved on my phone and, tbh, it feels really freeing and enlightening.

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Anonymous replying to -> OP 9w

“my personal porn star” 🤢

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Anonymous replying to -> #2 9w

What? You don’t want your bf/gf to be all sexy for you and do the kinda stuff you really like when you’re having intimate time?

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Anonymous replying to -> #3 9w

At least one of y’all understand what I was trying to say ❤️

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Anonymous replying to -> OP 9w

are you trying to unlearn the glorification of a dehumanizing transactional misrepresentation of what sex is, or not? “your own personal porn star” would be someone who’s contractually obligated to cater to your fantasies so they can afford to stay housed and fed

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Anonymous replying to -> #2 9w

That’s not the way I meant it. I just meant it in so much as they like to really show off for me sometimes. Going above and beyond just getting naked and getting it on. Teasing me throughout the day, teasing me leading up to play, maybe recreating scenes or something that we both like. Nothing where it’s a “contractually obligated” thing.

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Anonymous replying to -> OP 9w

“porn star” is a job. the sex they have is labor, a means to an end—their own desires and pleasure aren’t relevant to what’s done to their bodies, because the purpose is to create an edited fantasy video to sell. it’s fake and unfulfilling. sex with someone you love should be nothing like that

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Anonymous replying to -> #2 9w

Ok well I misspoke then, and I apologize. I’ve tried time and again to explain what I meant. I don’t know why you need to keep coming after me. I don’t want sex with my gf to be transactional or fake or anything like that.

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Anonymous replying to -> OP 9w

i’m not “coming after you”, i’ve worked in the adult industry before firsthand and i’m explaining to you why it’s a really bad idea to think about real life non-transactional sex via the language / framework of pornography

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Anonymous replying to -> #2 9w

Using that term in this sense in the only time I think about it like that. I want my girl to want to (over her own free will obv) send me all kinds of pics from all kinda of angles wearing whatever she feels sexiest in. That’s what I mean by it. So no, I don’t ever really think about sex with my person as transactional or something that’s not very intimate and loving. I hope we’re on the same page.

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Anonymous replying to -> OP 9w

as in, if you’re trying to break away from the effect porn consumption has on your personal relationships, you can start by not wanting your future partner to “be your porn star”. i’m telling you why anyone with critical awareness of the industry would be creeped out by that wording, that’s all

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Anonymous replying to -> #2 9w

I get that, and it makes sense. Whereas I’ve never actually been associated with that industry, it didn’t occur to me it might come off far worse than I intended. I had in my mind how I meant for it to sound and come across. That doesn’t mean that’s how it will come across to everybody else. And honestly, I appreciate you bringing to my attention that it was in poorer taste than I realized to word it that way

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Anonymous replying to -> OP 9w

bringing that to your attention was the intent. it just gave me a visceral reaction to see you say that without seeming to recognize the implications in terms of what being a porn star actually entails. not like i think you’re a bad person for what you ultimately *meant* by it, to be clear

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Anonymous replying to -> #2 9w

Yea I gotcha. :)

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