Anonymous #7 10w

honestly it probably is

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Anonymous #7 10w

could be a sign that there’s a way out and without him. maybe just a reminder but i wouldn’t take it as a sign cause everyone’s relationship is different and every relationship faces hardship

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Anonymous #7 10w

no this isn’t a sign

25

i mean we are in constant arguments recently and this one just pushed me over the edge

38

Anonymous #11 10w

then move out, move in with ur parents or something. or if its your apartment or whatever, kick him out

4

Anonymous #16 10w

it’s not that easy for everyone

11

Anonymous #7 10w

yes this is a sign. i broke up with my ex nearly 2 years ago bc i was in ur same situation where we were fighting constantly back and forth, every other conversation biting each others heads off, and it just got to the point where it was exhausting and i couldnt take it anymore. know who you are, stand your ground, and know your limits.

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Anonymous #16 10w

wow thank you for sharing. this is also long distance and we have different views on life and future and politics and stuff which creates arguments

26

Anonymous #11 10w

i know its easier said than done, but its what needs to be done. try to take your feelings out of it. i know its hard but it will be less awkward if your not around him and you also wont feel the urge to get back together with him and he wont guilt trip you and make you feel bad for dumping him.

4

Anonymous #7 10w

I was long distance too. and we had been together for 3 years too almost 4. and he talked about having kids with me all the time and wanting to marry me (but only while he was shitfaced and drunk off his ass). and i wasnt ready for those commitments at all. i was only thinking about my future career and finishing college to earn my degree. i was nowhere near ready to do anything with him. i didnt feel like i was 'in love' with him.

13

Anonymous #7 10w

Take this from me, someone who’s currently married, you will have that period of time where you argue almost constantly. This is the true test of whether you can handle rough patches. Me and my husband argued for almost a year straight and we got through it. Was it hard? Yes. It’s never easy. If working it out with who you’re with work, great. And sometimes you might just have to split. That’s okay too. Don’t automatically resort to leaving, that’s childish shit (to an extent)

19

Anonymous #16 10w

yes exactly how i feel- i feel guilty when i am scared about getting married and having children which he talks about a lot. I feel like i am too young for even thinking about that

8

Anonymous #16 10w

Babe it’s not that easy. Have you seen how expensive it is to break a lease?

3

Anonymous #7 10w

if you have that gut feeling and you lost the fire of when you first met him, its sad, but i would leave him. thats how i felt with my ex. i just lost the spark and didnt feel the love for him that i did in the beginning of our relationship. my love for him changed. and i just didnt love him the way i used to anymore and saw all his red flags. i took the rose colored glasses off.

7

There’s such thing as too many arguments

15

Anonymous #22 10w

How are you doing??

4

Anonymous hermatcha 10w

very relieved. it was super toxic. obviously very sad but i know it’s for the better!

8

Anonymous #7 10w

If he doesn’t make you happy, if he doesn’t respect you, if he doesn’t cherish you, you deserve better. I fought like you did with my last boyfriend and so much of it was because he didn’t take my feedback into consideration, just shut down no matter how productively I expressed it. I’m with “the one” now and even if it’s hard to hear, he is ALWAYS invested in learning how to be better to me. He literally takes notes when i give him feedback. We fight way less because he repeats mistakes less

12

Anonymous #25 10w

You never deserve to beg or pull teeth just to get him to treat you with love or dignity. He should feel so motivated to do so that he listens intently when you express how he can love you better

11

Anonymous OP 10w

Self love to the fullest

5

Anonymous #7 10w

This is me piggybacking off of what #16 said earlier--- I think that having different views on politics and stuff like that will get even harder. I would want to share values with someone I choose to marry. If our values do not line up with each other, I would rather leave him than continue. That would get so exhausting to me too

4

Anonymous #21 10w

Who keeps deleting their comments

12

Anonymous #7 10w

baby lemme tell you, watch how he reacts when you cry. my ex used to sleep peacefully knowing he made me cry and it never moved him. a man that CARES will always feel something when you cry because of him. my brother made his wife cry two months ago and he’s felt so guilty ever since so he showered her with gifts and showed her how he’d never raise his voice at her again. a man who cares will always put his pride aside for his girl

14

Anonymous #35 10w

ur definitely a man

8

Anonymous moonlightbae 10w

I fear, stupid and uncalled for, two key ingredients of a man

6

Anonymous moonlightbae 10w

Ok and… idrc that you got offended

-4

Anonymous imatrolltfouttau 10w

You all just dont like hearing the truth i fear

-4

Anonymous jackjqvk 10w

Girl I am glad you were able to get out of there tho

3

Anonymous #31 10w

Me too. Especially since he’s been gone for a month and will be gone the next three years (navy)

2

Anonymous jackjqvk 10w

Ohhhh 😕

1

Anonymous #31 10w

The navy thing wasn’t much of an issue, I knew the info about it heading into the relationship, but he wasn’t happy I was working or busy finishing up school or anything, that I didn’t have much time for him or anything. Like excuse me, I’m trying to work to earn money to move for an upcoming job.

3

Anonymous jackjqvk 10w

And its a double standard too like he would be in the Marines so he cant really see you but also expects to make time to see you tho? I dont get men

3

Anonymous #31 10w

At least he wasn’t marines (separate branch). But legit yeah. And thank you for making me feel better about all this. The whole situation with him was adding a lot of undue stress on me when I already have enough to deal with, and I just couldn’t take it anymore. So I appreciate the ability to talk it out with someone, helping me see that my mental health really needed it. Much love and thanks to you

3

Anonymous jackjqvk 10w

dude if you ever need anyone else to talk to about all this, i know the situation you went through exactly. bc my ex was exactly like that. we were long distance too and he was so incredibly toxic during my 3rd year of college, like he spam facetime called me during the day while i had classes. which by the way, i told him my schedule and he knew what classes i had at what time of the day. also, he wouldnt let me go out with my friends to bars and would be so insecure and "worried for my safety"

1

Anonymous jackjqvk 10w

i would get so mad at him bc i wasnt allowed to do anything if he didnt approve of it. i finally had enough and broke things off as this behavior was going in for months on end. and he always was super jealous of me when i was with my friends having fun and he wasnt there. i didnt want my last year in college to be dragged down by his behavior bc it was so annoying and draining. i felt so better after i broke it off. its very stressful when u have a bf who acts like a 2nd parent almost

1

Anonymous jackjqvk 10w

its like u said, they add so much undue stress and you already have enough to worry about with your studdies. you dont need the weight of all their drama.

1