
Stressing yourself out and beating yourself up isn’t going to do you any good, it will make your cortisol spike and that will make it harder to loose the weight as it contributes to promoting fat storage and increased appetite while also messing with your metabolism. You came so far in achieving your goal and you know that you are capable of doing it because you’ve achieved it before. Give yourself grace, 30lbs is hard to loose and you were able to do it
Life, just like weight, is not stagnant or linear, and gaining it back or running into setbacks should not make you hate yourself. It hurts, I know and it’s hard to get out of the funk in the moment. Try meditating or doing things you enjoy to preoccupy yourself so you aren’t constantly stressed, and slowly make a plan to get back into a schedule when you are ready and mentally rested if you want to uptake your journey again.