i got engaged, had a kid, and then finally after having my second child we moved in together

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Depends. 2 households can be great if both are good environments. For ex, I had a friend whose parents were separated before she was born, but we used to go over her mom and dad’s houses and it was amazing. Neither parent bad mouthed the other, and if we got a ‘No’ from one parent, the other wouldn’t budge. I can see what you’re saying though, children are a BIG decision. If you’re not mature enough to handle your own relationships, you shouldn’t create a new one that doesn’t have the choice.

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Yeah usually when ppl have kids together outside of marriage it's by accident...

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