Anonymous OP 1d

youtube and video games is a normal activity for any age, but doing it while on the phone with someone ur trying to be involved with is never ok at any age i fear. my ex did the same thing, if they cant give u undivided attention for any amt of time on a call, its a red flag

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Anonymous OP 1d

but i think he’s planning to ask to be official soon and i just don’t know if i want that. this is the first time in years that ive been single and the first time ever ive been content about it. we’ve just been talking for a while and i don’t want to hurt him or make him think i don’t care. like he’s super sweet and id love for him to hypothetically be my next partner, but i think he deserves much more than a hypothetical

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Anonymous OP 1d

ik the answer is obviously to let him know and communicate all of this. i’d just like to know whether or not im being harsh. i was unexpectedly taken off my bc for two months just started them again this week too, so idk if its even me talking or the emotional impact of the meds

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Anonymous OP 1d

It’s fully okay to tell him you aren’t sure. Letting something pass you by is so much better than forcing yourself into it. I fear saying yes would just cause you both pain if you’re not ready or fully into it

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Anonymous #2 1d

There’s also the chance he waits and betters himself for you. Saying not yet doesn’t always mean never

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Anonymous #1 1d

i absolutely do agree with you, i do want to add that we are long distance so sometimes our calls become doing stuff in each other’s presence as if we were physically there. however i do have reservations around it still bc i do see it as a red flag most times

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Anonymous #2 1d

i like that mindset. i’m just so upset that ill likely hurt him no matter what i do. though cutting it now will be better than waiting ik

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Anonymous OP 1d

ohhh i didnt know yall were long distance so that type of stuff is more normal lol. if u got together officially would it still be long distance? i dont think long distance is worth it if ur not into it fully. also if its some unexplainable little piece of you that’s pushing back, its prob ur intuition, listen to it.

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Anonymous #1 1d

we’d still be long distance. ig medium distance is more accurate, but it’s still a commitment to see each other. i was also thinking the intuition thing, like for some reason his friend group and how they all hang out just rub me the wrong way even though there’s literally nothing wrong with it. it’s almost like pattern recognition from my ex or something

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Anonymous OP 1d

ok now we’re cooking. a woman’s intuition and small feelings feelings about things are veeerryy powerful things. your intuition is giving you a little tug, now its up to u on if u listen or not. i spent yeeears ignoring that tug bc it never seemed logical, but despite logic and facts, despite literally anything, its always been correct.

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Anonymous #1 1d

i think i’m going to at least let him know that i don’t think im ready for anything official yet. i don’t want to say yes and find myself in a ticking time bomb situation either waiting for something bad to inevitably happen or spend our days together anticipating something to go wrong

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Anonymous OP 1d

Unfortunately that is a risk with things like this but it’s so important to be honest with yourself and it’s already amazing that you know you’re not ready for anything official yet. Listen to yourself and your feelings and it will all turn out for the best for both of you!!

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Anonymous OP 1d

sounds like a solid plan, u got it queen!!

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Anonymous #2 1d

thank you so much 🫶🫶

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Anonymous #1 1d

thanks for helping!! i really just needed to discuss this with someone who wasnt biased 🫶🫶

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Anonymous #3 1d

damn girl you good?? sending all the love 😭🫶🫶

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Anonymous OP 1d

yeah hopping back in here to defend u queen why did u randomly start getting downvotes tf ??? it was not like that when we were having our comment convo wtf 😭

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Anonymous #1 1d

i think they might be downvoting the video game while fting thing but idk 😭

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Anonymous OP 15h

I’m proud of you, I think it was the best choice you had to make for the both of you. And just because it’s the best choice doesn’t make it any less of a hard choice. You both are long distance and long distance is hard enough, but it is especially harder if you both are in two different phases of life and if you had kept continuing the relationship then deeper feelings would be getting involved and in the end, it would’ve been an even worse situation because sometimes love just isn’t enough

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Anonymous #3 15h

And figuring out that all the time, love and energy you poured into a person was not enough to keep a relationship going is not a very fun life experience to go through. I think you saved yourself from an even worse heartbreak.

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Anonymous #3 11h

thank you so much, i’m very proud of myself for recognizing it so early

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