Anonymous #1 12h

What did number 2 say

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Anonymous #3 12h

I don’t know. I suspect they blocked me when (on a different post) I asked them to show a source for the claim that the lead actor of heated rivalry said a slur. I made this comment when this post was at -1 upvotes, shortly after it was posted.

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Anonymous #1 12h

Awh fuh my nosey ass wanted to know what was up with

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Anonymous #2 12h

No 😭 cuz I virtually don’t feel sexual feelings at all and I don’t need sexual relations in a relationship at all. I don’t want nor need sex and don’t feel sexual feelings. I only experience these feelings under very specific circumstances which may not even allow these feelings to manifest anyway. Most people do not experience sexual attraction in this manner or experience sexual attraction when I simply don’t.

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Anonymous OP 12h

I guess I just really don’t understand how you can be like “partially” asexual😭 like idk. I would be really interested to see neurological studies done that could maybe look at the brains of ace people and see if there’s anything special going on. I guess like in my mind most sexuality is a spectrum but being ace to me is like the whole point is that you have 0 sexual desires and that’s why it’s like noteworthy and why we made a distinction for it, so in my mind that’s way more black and white

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Anonymous #2 12h

vast majority of people are not like this otherwise hookup culture would be virtually nonexistent bffr

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Anonymous #3 12h

basically dismissing OPs explanation of being demisexual with “so how most people are”

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Anonymous #5 12h

I can’t reply to your other comment about it being how most people are but while hookup culture is a thing, there are a lot of people who aren’t comfortable with sex outside of a relationship

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Anonymous #4 12h

I mean demisexual is a form of asexuality. Asexuality at its core means no sexual attraction. I don’t feel sexual attraction in my day to day life. I don’t see people and think they’re hot, I just don’t. I see my partners as purely romantic. On some occasion, I may engage in sexual acts but that’s typically when that is encouraged by my partner and I’m okay with engaging in those acts despite not necessarily feeling sexual attractions. Yes, I understand it’s confusing.

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Anonymous #4 12h

that doesn’t mean most people are the way OP is describing themself as tho. especially not in college either, where hookup culture is the most prominent.

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Anonymous #4 12h

ace/aro are both spectrums. there are different labels along those spectrums that describe how an individual experiences sexual/romantic feelings.

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Anonymous OP 11h

Ok so I’m following and that sounds like you have no sexual desires which sounds like just asexuality is it not like I just don’t understand 😭

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Anonymous #5 11h

But I just don’t understand how it’s a spectrum when the whole idea of it being novel is that you have NO sexual attraction or desire

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Anonymous #5 11h

“Hookup culture” hardly even is an actual thing our generation is having wayyyy less sex than previous generations

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Anonymous #4 11h

Also I just hate that phrase it’s so slut shamey

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Anonymous #4 11h

Asexuality isn’t supposed to be “novel” it’s a form of sexual attraction (a lack of). Demisexuals experience sexual attraction in such specific circumstances that it may seem like it’s not “real” or “exaggerated”. Demisexuals don’t feel sexual attraction until a particular moment in which a deep emotional bond is formed. It’s such a specific experience it’s hard to explain.

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Anonymous OP 11h

I only meant novel as in it’s a deviation from the norm I just feel like if you experience sexual attraction even in rare situations you’re not ace

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Anonymous #4 11h

That’s true. Hookup culture is also a thing. Both can be true. I don’t disagree that it comes off a little “slut shame-y” as a phrase, but it’s not inherently a bad thing. Just kind of emotionally loaded due to a lot of sex-negative cultural attitudes.

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Anonymous #4 11h

I feel like it’s not your place to tell someone what their identity is. Especially since you don’t really seem to understand the idea of demisexuality, and ace identities in general

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Anonymous #1 11h

That’s just how it feels to me. Being asexual is just a whole different can of worms from typical sexuality differences and dynamics and because it’s a very different thing I am interested in it and what causes it and the systems and processes that lead to it, but I just feel like things are being over complicated

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Anonymous #4 11h

I don’t really think that there’s “systems and processes that lead to [asexuality],” it’s a sexuality like any other. Like “transgender,” it’s an umbrella term (although it is also a sexuality on its own)

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Anonymous #4 11h

our gen isn’t the only gen that exists on the planet what? there are people in older gens unmarried & having sex without a relationship.

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Anonymous #5 11h

“Especially not in college” was the part that made me assume this was talking about our generation

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Anonymous #4 11h

well our gen isn’t the only gen in college either. non-traditional college students exist

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Anonymous #1 11h

Well there has to be though. When I say systems and processes I mean like cognitively. And it’s not exactly like all other sexualities because it’s a disinterest in sexuality as a whole and I want to know what might cause that, since it’s not like evolutionarily advantageous or anything

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Anonymous #5 11h

Yeah sure whatever when people talk about college students and hookup culture 99% of the time they’re talking about out 18-24 year olds

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Anonymous #4 11h

Hookup culture is VERY ALIVE in colleges. Our generation isn’t having as much sex, but that doesn’t change that fact. If it’s not alive at your college, you are the outlier here.

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Anonymous #4 11h

either way the point is majority of people do not approach sexual relationships in the same manner an ace individual would. if that was the case, asexuality wouldn’t be bewildering & hookup culture wouldn’t exist.

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Anonymous #5 11h

I mean yeah

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Anonymous #4 11h

The cognitive processes of an ace person, as they relate to sexual attraction, go like this: see person -> don’t feel sexual attraction. If you want to know more about ace identities, then google them like a regular person, instead of posting on yikyak about how you don’t understand them, and then saying stupid shit.

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Anonymous #1 11h

Idk the best way to convey what I mean, which is that the idea of people hooking ip having some sort of culture surrounding it is stupid and based in purity culture. It’s just people having sex at the end of the day nothing to write home about

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Anonymous #4 11h

I can see how that’s interesting. But being gay and asexual actually does have evolutionary advantages. For example, population control. With gays and asexuals, you have a permanent group of non-reproducing peoples. Well from there, if these peoples are not reproducing, their abilities can be used elsewhere in a communal sense. Gay couples and asexuals can be alloparents, hunters, gatherers, while other people in the community support the general population in another manner.

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Anonymous #1 11h

I appreciate the sentiment, but that is not how cognition works it’s not that simple

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Anonymous OP 11h

Yes definitely and there is some evidence that being gay could be evolutionarily beneficial, I suppose I’m also interested in the fact that like obviously our brains are wired to desire and respond to sexual stimulus so i wonder if that’s any different in ace people and if there is one what that difference is

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Anonymous #4 11h

I don’t fundamentally disagree. However, it’s still a distinct attitude around engaging with sex, with distinct rituals and practices, and vocabulary. Just because purity culture exists doesn’t mean it gets a say on other means of thinking about sex

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Anonymous #5 10h

Lowkey bean souping here but

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Anonymous #4 10h

I don’t know what you were expecting other than a simplified explanation. Like genuinely, you’re on yikyak.

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Anonymous #4 10h

Why is this getting downvoted this is interesting

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Anonymous #1 10h

Also respectfully they are right cognition is not that simple

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Anonymous #4 10h

I’ve thought that as well about my own self. The systematic process of our human instincts want to reproduce and clearly something within my brain is differing in that sense. It would be interesting, as you stated, to have medical examinations and testing to see what those cognitive differences could be. However, it is possible that asexuality is just another variation of sexual attraction as being gay, lesbian, etc. is.

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Anonymous #1 10h

Well that’s why I’m talking about researching it lol I wasn’t asking you for an explanation of how it works

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Anonymous OP 10h

I guess the difference as I see it is that like with being gay lesbian straight whatever alo identity, there is an object of desire. Like the whole idea of a “sexuality” is to specifically state what category that is (forgive my language it’s easier to simplify if I use terms like this) with ace identities there is no object of desire because you don’t actually have sexual desires The way I’ve understood it was that ace was different than a sexuality really because it was more like the absence

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Anonymous #1 10h

Fair enough

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Anonymous #3 10h

I see. I suppose I view asexuality, even though it is a lack of sexual feelings, as a form of sexual experience regardless if there are sexual feelings or not. Asexuality is still an expression of sexuality and I’m still experiencing sexuality, just in a different manner than those who experience sexual desire.

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Anonymous OP 10h

That’s super fair, I’m a very sexual person so it’s hard for me to conceptualize sexuality without like desire if that makes sense

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Anonymous #3 9h

It makes perfect sense. We have such vastly differing experiences on two different ends of the sexuality spectrum.

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