it's usually the husband/bf finding it hot to see his wife with another woman so these couples will put their settings to be sapphic oriented to try and match with queer women. it's annoying because there's subreddits for that yet they go and bother lesbians for their own fantasies
Sadly, I haven’t bc it is the best way to meet other queer people in my very conservative area. It has motivated me to primarily be les4les bc I haven’t had a lesbian surprise me with a girlfriend/wife and it has become like a safety thing bc sometimes these husband/boyfriends get aggressive and I prefer to not be hit