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LGBTQIA+ 10w
I hate when people compliment strangers for looking androgynous without knowing if that was something they intended to do. The number of queer people who have thought it was okay to comment on my gender presentation, and proudly gotten it wrong is 🫠
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8
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Anonymous 10w

What are your thoughts on “the gender is gendering”? I like it personally bcos it’s not assuming what I’m attempting to do w my presentation, just acknowledging that it’s obviously queer and that I’m doing a good job at it

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Anonymous 10w

Like, do you think you didn’t misgender me because you used the term boy girl instead of calling me a slur?

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Anonymous 10w

So many times people would assume I was nonbinary and exclusively use they/them for me (I wouldn’t really notice cause they were the types to use they/them for everyone) but when it would come up that I’m not nb they’d be like “noooo way! But you’re so androgynous!” And I wouldn’t really know what to say to that.

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Anonymous replying to -> #3 10w

People always assume I’m trans or nb, when I’m just a hairy cis woman. There’s nothing wrong with looking or being andro, it just hurts to know it doesn’t even occur to some people that I’m a woman.

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Anonymous replying to -> OP 10w

I’m not hairy at all, just part Asian with really ambiguous features and interesting fashion sense. Plus gay ofc. I never got offended, I just thought it was weird they’d 110% commit to their assumption without asking anyone. Not me, not my friends.

upvote 5 downvote
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Anonymous replying to -> #3 10w

Ykw that’s another fantastic point, WOC and especially queer WOC are masculinized no matter what they do or how they express themselves because our view of femininity is rooted in white supremely. My bff is the most beautiful femme in the entire world and yet people constantly call her a stud just bcos she’s black n is rocking w short hair

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Anonymous replying to -> #1 10w

Honestly this is making me a little emotional to be referred to as a WOC and facing problems other WOC face as if it’s a given because it’s so often just assumed that Asians are not POC the same way Black and brown people are (at least where I am)???? So thanks you for that lol! But like ya, femininity for me is boxy shapes and simplicity, I didn’t grow up with white beauty standards. I never really thought about it being a race problem but now I can’t unsee it

upvote 3 downvote
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Anonymous replying to -> #3 10w

I’m 3/4 South Asian and Middle Eastern descent, and I can tell you that race almost always factors into it. People always assume I should be more masc than I am bc I don’t look like a white woman. Like, I have waist length hair and I’m wearing a sundress with a TS cardigan, but I will still get asked if I’m masc

upvote 1 downvote