Anonymous #1 14w

Glad im not the only one with these feelings. So you consider yourself some flavor of genderqueer/nb/trans?

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Anonymous #3 14w

Sure, but if i am why does it feel so “magnetic” sometimes. Like sometimes if i was offered 10k usd or like.. having my makeup done id take the makeup. It feels like.. my heart hitches in my chest and magnetic sometimes. Its not like choosing to wear blue or green. Wear a hat or not. Its.. like if i ignore the cravings they become every 3rd thought.

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Anonymous #3 14w

Then other times, having my makeup done makes me feel “gross” or “bad”. Its so weird. Or just like.. all sorts of expression-y stuff. Sometimes ill wannna wear a dress. Other times that sounds pointless and dumb.

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Anonymous recursive 14w

Sort of non-binary or genderqueer, but I feel like a poser because I’m kind of “woman by default” even if I feel alienated from certain gendered aspects of socialization (like in friendships and romance). how can I say I’m not a woman if I continue to shuffle along in default womanhood because that’s what I was born and raised in? Some might call it agender, but idk.

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Anonymous recursive 14w

On and off since my teens, I’ve always imagined a male “alter ego” or found ways to try to pass as a boy for some brief instance. So there’s that. In recent years, I’ve been giving myself a men’s haircut with clippers and scissors, and buying some guys’ clothes from the thrift store. I perceive myself as masc in my casual clothes and zero makeup at home, but going out I usually wear makeup and more feminine clothes, partly because makeup and making colorful outfits are among my hobbies.

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Anonymous #1 14w

I don’t know if there’s really point to all this, I just appreciate the chance to hear and share thoughts among similar lines. I don’t think these have to mean are or aren’t any particular gender or role, but it’s interesting to ponder.

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Anonymous #1 14w

No!! Theres a big point i legit live the same shit from the other side.

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Anonymous recursive 14w

That sounds like personality/preferences to me, which again is totally fine. Even if the realm of personality traits, having to exist outside of what feels natural to you can feel distressing and unnatural. But it’s still very okay and very possible to be a man who feels drawn to/a lot better existing outside of societal views of what manhood should entail

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Anonymous #3 14w

My therapist says im some sort of genderqueer/genderfluid. She says im probably not cis because i question it. How do you know when youre actually nonbinary/something?

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Anonymous recursive 14w

Your therapist should not be telling you who you are. They can suggest it as a possibility but it’s entirely up to you to explore that and come to that conclusion

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Anonymous recursive 14w

Also you shouldn’t be feeling pressure to label it if it’s causing you stress. You can just vibe for a while as authentically you as possible and reevaluate in a year or so or until you feel a genuine connection to a label. Or be unlabeled forever. Labels don’t have to define you

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Anonymous #4 14w

I honestly get sad when i think im cis. I really dont think i am.the thought of that makes me a lil sad.

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Anonymous recursive 14w

Questioning definitely does not mean you’re not cis. There are plenty of cis people who have questioned their gender and/or transitioned. Sounds like your therapist needs to be more educated on these things. It might be worth analyzing why you get sad when you think about being cis and identifying the specific things that are causing those feelings. But like #4 said, there’s no rush to figuring things out

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