Anonymous #3 6w

I'm OP. I am trying to understand. Everyone is intentionally misunderstanding what I'm saying. I never said you have to be masculine to be a man and for some reason every comment on that post is "men can be feminine" like that's literally missing the post. And then person tried to offer an actual explanation based on their experience, but I already understand what they're saying because their experience is not the circumstance I'm talking about in the post

1

Anonymous #4 6w

Well I am OP and I was posting in good faith. Everyone commenting is assuming that I didn't post in good faith and making arguments that I don't disagree with because they aren't talking about what the post specifically is talking about. And then when I say "I agree but I'm not talking about that, I'm talking about that" we circle straight back to "you don't have to understand" or "that's such a small minority, why do you care" so really no one has actual thoughts on what I'm talking about

1

Anonymous OP 6w

I think that’s mostly because everyone is different. even a question as simple as “why are you trans” is going to have a variety of answers. but specifically “why be a trans guy while also liking femininity”? that’s going to be even more specific to the individual. If this was the post I’m thinking of, you also got at least two people who fit that demographic who explained their personal experience in good faith.

4

Anonymous #5 6w

Well no, because my question was never "why be a trans guy while also liking femininity" and that's why the good faith responses didn't answer the question because they were responses to a question I wasn't asking. My question isn't why a trans man might still embrace some aspects of femininity, my question was what makes you feel that you are a man if you do nothing differently, physically or socially, from when you identified as a woman

1

Anonymous #5 6w

Like the question is what does is mean to you to identify as a man instead of a woman if you don't transition at all in a physical or social sense? Like what exactly are you transitioning from and to and on what basis? What did you not identify with in womanhood and what do you identify with in manhood if you didn't change anything going from one to the other? And this isn't pertaining to closeted people who can't transition physically or socially, it's people who can but don't want to

1

Anonymous #5 6w

Like lots of words but my curiosity is just what does it mean to you to be a man and to not be a woman if you are the same and unchanged whether you call yourself one or the other

1

Anonymous OP 6w

I see what you’re saying, yeah. I still think it heavily depends on the individual though, “being a man” will mean different things to different men. Knowing for yourself that you’re a man/woman/neither is often separate from the view others have of you, and figuring that out doesn’t always make people suddenly decide to change their habits or appearance, often their behavior has already been different from their agab.

4

Anonymous #5 6w

I think the main thing is that these labels are descriptive, not prescriptive. These people are calling themselves men because… that’s the description they feel matches best. There isn’t any other particular thing that’s going to be common across all of them.

3

Anonymous #5 6w

To be clear, I totally understand where you’re coming from, gender is a social construct and has lots of ties to behavior and looks. However, different people will have much weaker or stronger internal views of their own gender than others. I personally have very little internal affinity with any gender. The people you’re discussing likely have a much stronger internal relationship with gender, separate from the things that make up their outward presentation.

5

Anonymous #5 6w

This is the first response I've gotten where the person was actually trying to understand where I was coming from lol so thanks I feel like this actually does give some insight

2

Anonymous OP 6w

no problem, glad I could be a bit of a help!

1