idk. i just want to be seen as a human being by default. feeling attractive and wanted is very nice! but if i’m only ever “yearned for”, i feel like people don’t really like me as a person. and it’s also like, i can’t make a single sex joke or everyone assumes that’s an invitation to solicit themselves.

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No I totally get what you’re saying tho, in general queer spaces feel highly sexualized. Most revolve around dating or sex in some way (like queer bars, its place to meet people and hookup, online communities are mostly dating sites or break down into them, and bc of how closely knit the kink and queer spaces are kink spaces are often bunched in with queer spaces). Like I kinda just wanted to exist in a queer space without the assumption of here to fuck, yaknow?

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