Anonymous OP 21h

just placing yourself into them and assuming you’ll just fit in because you’re one of the girls may work in spaces oriented towards women but it does not work in spaces oriented towards queer people because you’re not part of the in group anymore. and is a lot of the reason people get pissed at straight girls at gay clubs for example is because they just assume they can be there and do whatever they want and it’ll be fine without having to do the work to be respectful

34

Anonymous #1 21h

they’re allowed in but being a girl does not mean you can just welcome yourself right in and make yourself at home. you’ve got to understand you’re taking part in someone else’s culture not your own and you’ve gotta try to be respectful and listen to their feedback

25

Anonymous #2 21h

omg thisssssssss. i’m a lesbian and nothing makes me hate you more than saying some shit like this. it’s so male centric and homophobic while pretending to be like “pro lesbian” somehow.

55

Anonymous #2 20h

omg I'm aroace and I get told this all the time! and it's pretty much always said right after I've talked about how isolating being aroace can be...

41

Anonymous OP 20h

Yeahh like they think its flattering but rlly what it says is "i see your identity as an escapist fantasy id be able to wear where id be able to be unbothered by men i find frustrating." As if we dont still have to deal with that. Im all for recruiting lesbians but it feels so reductive when ppl say that to me

46

Anonymous #2 19h

well-put

11

Anonymous #5 19h

They call me the eloquent eater 😈

11

Anonymous #6 18h

now hold up. do you really think of “you are not part of the LGBTQIA community if you are not lesbian, gay, bisexual, trans, queer, intersex, asexual or aromantic” as “gatekeeping”?

6

Anonymous #6 18h

which part of the acronym do u think a cishet woman falls under

19

Anonymous #8 18h

i’m not saying they’re apart of that community, i’m saying it really doesn’t matter

-5

Anonymous #2 17h

I’m not straight but it just doesn’t work like that, when I say I wish I was a lesbian it’s because men genuinely repulse me but if I find a good one I’ll be attracted to them. I don’t want to be attracted to men at all and kissing women won’t make me any closer to being a lesbian

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Anonymous #6 17h

Why would it not matter when homosexuality has been demonized and illegalized everywhere in the world? If community doesn’t matter then nothing matters, your label doesn’t matter, your experiences don’t matter, the sacrifices of the past generations don’t matter, and the world loses meaning. It really is that deep btw

11

Anonymous #9 17h

Its still weird babe. Associating lesbians in how they are diametrically opposite to men or that its a solution to repulsion to men feels weird. Thats cool you are also gay but it doesnt mean your words have that much different of an impact 🤷

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Anonymous #9 17h

Past generations didn’t fight so you guys could decide who is and who isn’t allowed to be included in the LGBTQIA+ community lol. It doesn’t matter to me, of course, but maybe rather instead of being so focused on who or who isn’t included, maybe you should focus on the closeted people who are struggling because they don’t have anyone to go to.

-6

Anonymous #9 17h

*does matter to me* oops

-3

Anonymous #9 17h

lesbians suffer from comphet & other forms of discrimination & oppression at the hands of men, so saying “I wish I was a lesbian” is implying you think being a lesbian means you’d avoid the shittiness of men in the dating scene, which is. not the case at all.

29

Anonymous #9 17h

also idk why people choose to bring up lesbians & imply they’re privileged for not being attracted to men when people could just say “I wish men in the dating scene were better” or smth

23

Anonymous #5 17h

that’s obviously not what they mean when they say that. They say that because they might find it easier to get along with women. Idt it’s that awful to wish you had a different sexual orientation, I’m sure plenty of lgbtqia people can agree that they have wished they like the other gender at least once.

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Anonymous #6 16h

I’m aroace and have wished I had a different sexual orientation, so yes. there’s a difference between lamenting over your situation & accepting a tradeoff and acting like someone else’s situation is privileged or better.

13

Anonymous OP 16h

FUCKING THANK YOU. GOD. i’m beyond SICK of these ppl claiming queerness when they’re just socially profiting off of aligning with our labels, while appropriating our BIPOC AND TRANS LED culture and making fun of kink, cracking AIDS jokes, the heated rivalry obsession etc. fucking makes me sick anyway

4

Anonymous #5 16h

like i said, that’s obviously not what they mean lol

-3

Anonymous #6 16h

How do u know thats not what they mean 😭😭 like its not explicit its implicit and constant. Which is annoying. Its another form of fetishism. I will always recruit aspiring lesbians but im talking about primarily straight women who are just saying that cuz they are frustrated in their dating life

11

Anonymous #2 16h

well if they’re saying they’d rather be lesbian because “men suck” that must mean they’re inferring they would rather be lesbian because women don’t suck. i don’t believe hetero people should fetishize the lgbtq, but I wish as a society people cared less about labels. Obviously that system was set up by the world before us, but yk

7

Anonymous #1 16h

we respect u for this bae dw

2

Anonymous #6 15h

Still comes off as a privileged, out of touch take regardless, political lesbians did a number on the lesbian community and we don’t want that shit coming back anytime soon, its not the same as queer people wishing they were cishet or attracted to the opposite gender because that comes from a place of internalized homophobia or wishing they weren’t oppressed for their identity by society, and it is that deep

10

Anonymous #6 14h

that’s fine as an inside thought but it’s strange to say to a lesbian that they wish they were a lesbian as a straight woman. it’s ignoring the reality of what it’s like to be a lesbian, and you’re showing that you haven’t thought about what that feels like for the person you’re *telling it to.* doesn’t matter if it wasn’t intentional, that’s a microaggression.

13

Anonymous #6 14h

you keep saying “that’s obviously not what they mean” but that’s not the point? microagressions are rarely intentional, but that doesn’t mean they’re ok.

10

Anonymous #13 14h

aw but you don’t deserve to feel bad, you’re literally part of the acronym! even if you were cis you still wouldn’t be encroaching

5

Anonymous #6 13h

Yeah queer ppl wish they were straight so they get to keep their family or aren’t murdered. They are saying it bc they pick shitty partners. Not the same and is lowkey privileged

8

Anonymous #6 12h

it’s not about gatekeeping it’s about straight women going into queer clubs and gay bars and making the patrons uncomfortable or turning a queer space into one for straight women. or using and consuming our language, fashion, and culture in a fetishistic or gentrifying fashion. i’m not saying anyone can’t be queer or even that not being queer means you can’t be involved in queer culture but just being a woman does not give you some kind of special in

5