sure, the fact that she sexually harassed and attempted to coerce chris on live tv, the way she yelled at talked down to cussed out bombshells behind their backs, the 3-4 hour long conversation where she yelled at Jeremiah blaming him for everything the way every single one of her âapologiesâ had a âbut you did this which is why i did thatâ âOh she got no sleep oh it was such a stressful environmentâ absolutely but it was like that for EVERYONE in that villa and huda was the only crashing out
how is she sexually harassing him when she just wanted to cuddle? not saying the way she went about it was correct, however to say she was sexually harassing or trying to coerce him is such a stretch. i donât agree with her cussing people out as well. she did apologize though and take accountability for her actions. she was not the only one that crashed out, many other people did in that villa did.
i genuinely do believe that the downfall of her relationship with jeremiah was bc of everyone elseâs involvement. a lot of the islanders and america wanted to sabotage their relationship and thatâs why her crash outs were a lot more emotional. not to excuse them, but to give context. i genuinely do believe huda and jeremiah couldâve worked it out if they had a private relationship. it being publicized was the downfall of that relationship.
it was probably edited out, and he doesnât have to say anything to make it not be true. if he just didnât feel like arguing that makes sense i think people being so quick to defend such a genuinely uncomfortable ass situation is so fucking weird and exactly why itâs hard for men to speak up about assault and harassment
iâm not defending anybody or anything. however, if chris never explicitly said he was assaulted or harassed, to put that kind of assumption out there is dangerous. itâs reality tv, we just watch from our homes. we donât know wtf happened. but saying things like that is a very serious allegation that shouldnât be taken lightly. unless chris ever said that was his experience, which he hasnât, all of this is speculation.
itâs not dangerous to put a label on what he said he said she knew he didnât want sex and she still tried to initiate it doesnât matter if he says itâs harassment or boundary pushing or not, thatâs what it is. period. plus victims ESPECIALLY men often have a really hard time labeling what happened bc they donât realize thatâs what it was until a lot later
respecting someoneâs boundary means not just backing off physically, but also not making them feel guilty for having the boundary in the first place. chris didnât do that. he shamed her for it. so if yâall are going to stretch the word âharassmentâ for huda, then letâs apply it to both. it canât be one-sided just because you like one person more.
atp, itâs starting to feel like some of yâall want chris to have been harassed just so you can keep demonizing huda. thatâs not about caring for victims, thatâs about using a serious issue as ammo for your hate. if chris ever says thatâs how he experienced it, then iâll listen. but twisting things to fit your narrative isnât advocacy, itâs projection.
iâve already acknowledged where huda went wrong. i just donât believe that miscommunication and emotional immaturity automatically equals harassment. thereâs a difference between holding someone accountable and labeling them with serious allegations that havenât been confirmed.
chris himself that she asked for sex before and then settled for cuddling. thatâs why in the episode, she says âthen just cuddle me at least.â they clipped it. and absolutely no one on that show was remotely close to how huda treated everybody else in the villa, sheâs an emotionally immature and unregulated weirdo
right, so thatâs not what sexual harassment is. sexual harassment involves unwelcome sexual advances, requests for sexual favors, or other verbal/physical conduct of a sexual nature â especially when it continues after a clear refusal, involves coercion, or creates a hostile or unsafe environment.
if huda asked for sex and accepted cuddling after chris said no, thatâs not harassment. thatâs asking, being told no, and backing off. even if it made him uncomfortable in hindsight, discomfort â harassment unless boundaries were pushed repeatedly or coercively. so unless she kept pressuring him after he said no, touched him without consent, or made him feel unsafe, it doesnât meet the definition. it may be emotionally immature or manipulative, but itâs not harassment.
and if weâre going to stretch the definition this far, then by that same logic, chris also sexually harassed huda by getting upset at her for not wanting to kiss him publicly and not respecting her boundary in that moment. watering down the definition just because you personally dislike someone is deeply offensive to actual survivors. harassment is serious, and using that word to demonize someone out of bias doesnât protect victims, it undermines them.
also, you calling her an âemotionally immature and unregulated weirdoâ tells me everything i need to know about how biased your lens is. atp, itâs not about accountability, itâs about trying to dehumanize someone you already dislike. and if weâre diagnosing people as âemotionally unregulated weirdosâ now, half the villa qualifies. the difference is you only apply that label to huda because you already canât stand her.
you wrote an essay tryna say coercion isnât sexual harassment when it literally is BY DEFINITION đđ he told her no, and she tried to force intimacy by weaponizing her own emotions. tryna compare that to chris pointing out that itâs weird for her to literally fuck him in a room full of ppl but not wanna kiss him in front of those same people is so ridiculous LMAOOO
you clearly didnât actually read what i said if youâre claiming i said coercion âisnâtâ sexual harassment. i literally acknowledged that coercion can be a component of sexual harassment, and said that if it happens, then it qualifies. the issue is that people are labeling this situation coercion when it doesnât meet the actual standard. thatâs the part youâre skipping over.
huda said sheâd be upset. thatâs not coercion. it can come off as emotionally immature or reactiveâbut it wasnât a threat, there was no repeated pressure, and she backed off when he didnât respond. emotional manipulation still isnât the same as coercion or harassment. those terms involve persistent pressure, disregard for boundaries, or making someone feel unsafeâall of which were absent here. not every awkward or emotional moment is abuse, and we cheapen serious terms when we pretend otherwise.
and my point about chris wasnât that he harassed herâitâs that if youâre going to water down the definition this far, then any emotional discomfort or reaction to a boundary could be spun into harassment, including what he did. if you donât like that comparison, maybe consider why youâre trying to twist one side into abuse and excuse the other. words like harassment and coercion mean something. if youâre going to use them, use them responsibly.
yeah that is literally not at all what she said and youâre definitely stretching the truth bc you hate her and wanna villainize her even more. iâm not even saying what she said or did was correct. she was wrong. point blank. end of discussion. but it was not sexual harassment or coercion.
i just rewatched the scene. all she said was âif not cuddling me is worth me being upset tomorrow, thatâs the battle youâre pickingâcongratulations,â and then she turned around and went to sleep. thatâs not coercion. thatâs an emotionally frustrated person expressing hurt in a dramatic way, but she didnât touch him after he said no, didnât threaten him, and didnât pressure him beyond that. you can criticize how she handled rejection without falsely labeling it harassment.
no, i understand the implication just fine. i just donât agree with the leap youâre making. thereâs a big difference between someone saying, âiâll be upset,â and someone threatening to make another person suffer for rejecting them. that kind of emotional projection might not be healthy, but itâs not harassment or coercion.
no itâs not bc i canât handle another perspective itâs bc i genuinely donât understand how youâre dense enough to be missing whatâs so fuckin obvious lmafo you use all these therapy words and donât even know what they mean and itâs soooo tiring like go meat munch someone who isnât attempting to coerce a man into having sex huda is too bad to have to do that anyway thatâs the whole gag yet here we are and he doesnât want her overwhelming emotionally draining ass
âyou use all these therapy words and you donât even know what they meanâ is so ironic considering the fact that i have a bachelorâs degree in psychology and iâm going to grad school to get my masterâs in professional counseling. ik exactly what iâm talking about and if youâre not understanding, itâs not bc iâm not making sense, but itâs bc youâre choosing to not understand. youâre willfully ignorant and extremely disrespectful.
you cannot handle a different perspective and itâs obvious considering your dumb ass tried to ask if i was on the spectrum⊠no i am not, goofy đđ and itâs the fact that you tried to ask as if youâre like genuinely interested or care. youâre trying to be condescending and anyone including me can see right through your bullshit.
youâre stretching and watering down these terms so much when thatâs not what coercion or sexual harassment even is. go educate yourself instead of trying to personally attack me or my intelligence. the fact that you cannot articulate your points without resorting to personal attacks is very telling.
and itâs very obvious you donât give a damn about victims and survivors. you just care about winning an argument. youâre not understanding that while youâre trying to win a pointless debate, youâre simultaneously disrespecting people who are actual survivors of sexual harassment. broaden your perspective and learn to engage with nuance. learn to see things objectively and not let your bias override the truth.
If you had read literally anything i said you would know how wrong you are bc the reason i care is BECAUSE im a survivor and all you know how to do is flip the narrative im either projecting my own trauma or i dont even care and iâm not gonna sit here and listen to someone so socially inept tell me how im psychologically incorrect when you just got all of these buzzwords off of the internet and probably didnât even take AP psych in highschool like girl goodbye
since youâre still in school, you probably donât know this but most degrees have your personal information on there, and iâm not gonna publicly post my private information⊠i do have a degree and i just graduated in may and iâm going to grad school in the fall for counseling. i donât need to post a picture of my degree to prove myself to a stranger on yikyak over a dumb debate about love islandâŠ
also, itâs ironic that youâre saying iâm flipping the narrative when thatâs all youâve done. you just tried to claim iâm invalidating your trauma and i never once said anything about your personal trauma. and i never meant being on the spectrum is a personal attack in that way. the way you asked it however and attempted to frame it as genuine when youâre obviously being condescending is weird.
i was assuming you would just cover that part i am actually aware of how a degree looks you actually canât be that dumb đ but no fr since ur so confident go ahead and post it!! prove ur in grad school post a pic of ur acceptance email bc ill post proof im a psych major! bc im not lying to try and make myself seem like something im not
iâm wishing you have a huge wake up call and learn that this profession is not the right calling for you if you are this desperate to invalidate menâs experiences with harassment and coercion and ESPECIALLY is you donât even know how to correctly identify what that looks like you missed some KEY points in your education and iâm GENUINELY going to be praying for your future clients truly bc WHEW
LMAO, okay girly pop. whatever narrative you wanna believe that makes you the happiest, go right ahead. again, i'm not posting my degree to satisfy a rando on the internet. i do not have to prove myself to you; you're not that important to međ you've literally been so disrespectful to me after i keep trying to end this conversation on a neutral note, so idk why you genuinely believe i'm gonna do anything for you đđđ
damn, i must really mean a lot to you if youâre out here trying to prove yourself to a stranger on the internetâespecially when i never even asked. this isnât the flex you think it is đđ and honestly? itâs even more embarrassing that youâre a junior in college but still acting this emotionally immature and disingenuous. a degree doesnât prove character⊠and youâre living proof đŹ
it doesnât mean a lot to me itâs just very easy to prove which you canât⊠you donât know me IRL and judging off of a tangential yik yak interaction does not give you a wholistic look into my maturity like letâs be so for real you should know this you are either in grad school and still on yik yak for some reason which like⊠move on! or you are just lying about your degree to give you some perceived level of âcredibilityâ that you donât have itâs not a flex in any way, you assumed i was a fresh-
freshman when iâm actually graduating in the spring, i was simply showing you that you are incorrect and yeah degrees donât prove character like congrats? do you know how many evil nursing majors there are out there? you donât gain moral high ground by not proving yourself it just makes you lack credibility lmao if you proved yourself i would respectfully disagree w your opinions but till i see some evidence that you arenât just a liar i dont
iâve been ignoring your catty insults, personal attacks, and ridiculous assumptions this whole time bc i simply donât owe it to you to flesh out every single one of my opinions about a reality show iâve left this for dead multiple times but you just keep coming back after claiming youâre over the convo talk about a lack of character and maturity
lol youâll learn this one day, but confidence doesnât need to be loud. if you were truly secure with yourself, you wouldnât feel the need to prove yourself to internet strangers. i donât need your validation, and thatâs why i donât see the value in posting my degree or proving my credibility to you LMAO. and the fact that youâre unable to just respectfully disagree without me posting my degree shows your lack of maturity.
when i said youâre emotionally immature and disingenuous, iâm referring to the way youâve been conducting yourself throughout this conversation. iâm only giving you back the same energy you gave me. if you donât like how it feels, then maybe consider changing your approach and how you engage with people.
i literally wished you good luck on your psych journey and tried to end on a neutral note, even after you were being disrespectful, disingenuous, immature, and rude. you tried to be condescending by asking me if i was on the spectrum simply bc i have a different perspective than you. and the fact that you tried to frame it as a âgenuineâ question shows that youâre being disingenuous bc anyone with eyes can see right through your bullshit.
then you even tried to say this profession isnât for me and that youâre gonna pray for my future clients⊠LMAO, like who do you think you are?? đđđ iâm able to have a civil discussion but the second you try to derail the conversation and deflect by using personal attacks like that, i have every right to defend myself. so please do not dish it if you canât take it. if you donât like how it feels on the receiving end, then change your approach.
also my love, if youâre gonna lie, then at least try to make it believable đ âiâve left this for dead multiple times,â no you didnât LMAO. i only even came back to this thread bc #4 responded to me, so i responded to them back. and then you willingly rejoined the conversation when nobody asked you to. no one was even talking to you, i was talking to #4. you did this to yourself, so donât get upset with me đ no one asked for you đ
i never attacked your character. i called out your behavior in this conversation, which has included projection, disrespect, and refusal to engage with nuance. if you consider that âdegrading your character,â maybe reflect on why that struck such a nerve. all iâm doing is holding up a mirror, if you donât like the reflection, then figure it out.
you keep insisting that anyone with eyes can see what huda was doing â but ironically, youâre the one ignoring what chris has and has not said about his own experience. youâre so focused on being ârightâ that youâve stopped actually listening, which is exactly what youâre accusing others of.
this hasnât been a good faith conversation â and thatâs not because we disagree. Itâs because youâve continually responded with snark instead of substance, insults instead of engagement, and self-righteousness instead of self-awareness. youâre not advocating for victims â youâre just using their pain as a platform to be condescending. if you truly cared about advocacy, this conversation wouldâve looked completely different.
the fact that you are unable to see that you have been doing the same thing the entire time is so silly once again you are telling me iâm not advocating for victims of assault when i quite literally am an advocate AND a victim all you care about is being on a moral high ground and invalidating a manâs experience w assault if you truly cared about victim advocacy you wouldnât explain away obvious coercion, and when i initially disagreed with you you wouldnât have told me i was projectingđ€·đŸââïž