Anonymous #1 9w

Good points, but again how to I make it not seem like I am desperate or nervous, and especially not come across as annoying, because often time I think I do come across that way. Annoying, or unwanted.

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Anonymous OP 9w

You will be seen as annoying sometimes and the best way to seem not desperate is to expand your opportunities to speak to women because you have to actually not be desperate. Women can smell it no matter what tricks you try to hide it if you’re desperate they know it sometimes you get lucky and they think it’s cute but a lot of times it’s off putting

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Anonymous #1 9w

But again how do you expand your opportunities without seeming desperate since they are so good at sniffing it out.

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Anonymous OP 9w

How old are you my man? First you have to make some guy friends and get some hobbies and those hobbies and interests will allow you to meet like minded people and boom connections right there or if your clubbing age go to the club and get some liquid courage and start asking girls out

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Anonymous #1 9w

25. I don’t go to clubs. I also have anxiety. Basically the things I am into few girls would ever be into. Finding groups with similar interests is next to impossible. Plus finding things to talk about without coming across as desperate is extremely hard.

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Anonymous OP 9w

Plus the things I am into come across as nerdy and/or annoying. That is unless you’re considered attractive then it doesn’t matter. So clearly I am not attractive.

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Anonymous OP 9w

I’m 25 too I understand the struggle. What are your hobbies or interests that you feel like women aren’t into? I’m not judging and don’t give af I’m a nerd who games and shit too you’re not gonna surprise me with shit lol

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Anonymous #1 9w

History, sports, other things, but really dislike small talk because coming from me it feels forced. Also feel like I can never be myself because myself is unattractive.

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Anonymous OP 9w

Are you in school or do you work? Also if I’m being annoying just tell me to stfu I’m just curious and want to help

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Anonymous #1 9w

Lots of girls like sports and I know there’s some historians out there too real shit

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Anonymous #1 9w

Online school, because I am struggling to find a job so had to go back to school.

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Anonymous #1 9w

Well I have not been able to find them in my neck of the woods. And if they do exist I have not found them. And ones I am into.

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Anonymous OP 9w

That’s alright man I went back to school too. What about friends how are we doing with those?

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Anonymous #1 9w

I don’t have really any close friends. Not really that are my age. The only people I would consider “close” friends are like my parents age. Other than that basically everyone I talk to is circumstantial based, and not regular at all. It’s usually only at certain times or certain events. I refer to the majority of the them as not more than acquaintances.

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Anonymous OP 9w

I actually have that problem too honestly are they close enough that you can use them to go out and explore and meet new people they don’t have to be super meaningful just enough to give you opportunities to meet new or more consistent people

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Anonymous OP 9w

For example, when before I left high school in 2018 I never talked to any of my classmates outside of school.

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Anonymous OP 9w

Same really goes to those I talked to during my previous time in school before now.

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Anonymous #1 9w

Again the problem is nothing is ever created to become like opportunities to meet new people or more consistent people.

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Anonymous OP 9w

At best they usually just lead to more acquaintances, not close friends or anything more.

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Anonymous OP 9w

When I was dating my ex she was really the only person my age that I talked to on a regular basis. I met her first through high school, then again threw a job I had at the time (which I hated).

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Anonymous OP 9w

So now really the only people I talk to on a regular basis are my parents (because I still live with them).

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Anonymous OP 9w

Hmm it might be time to reach out to some of these acquaintances and set something up or the other alternative is to go to local events or things that interest you and you’re gonna have to look right at the anxiety and go for it I’ve had to do that myself and it’s not fun but even a quick chat is a win. And also you need to learn to enjoy some level of small talk because not everyone is going to be ready to get into deep convo off the rip so making small talk is important

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Anonymous #1 9w

Especially with girls

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Anonymous #1 9w

Question is what do I even say to them? To girls that is.

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Anonymous OP 9w

Because for example here’s the situation I current am in. I am on a trip with a church group. And there are some pretty girls with us.

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