like it’s been a downward spiral for almost 10 years and every time i think things can’t get worse they ALWAYS do. i think ive just been in pain for so long ive become used to it. even laughing feels strange sometimes. most of the time i dont think i can laugh, not really.

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and i think part of it is bc people never believe me. i’ve learned how to mask everything so well for the sake of other people bc ive been told too many times to “stop calling attention to myself, no one cares”. and i feel like i don’t give myself the time or grace or space to feel that pain anymore. but i always know it’s there, like it’s just looming over my shoulder

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This is so real twin you’re valid as fuck (image unrelated)

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