I struggled allot with this too coming into a college a couple years ago. The sudden change of environment is jarring and very hard to adjust to. I had all C's my first sem. I too have struggled with passive thoughts of death. Getting a diagnosis is almost like a relief to just have an answer. Things do get better, your grades get better or you find a major you actually like, therapy actually starts helping and you make friends eventually. It's hard to see the light but it's there 🫶🏻

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