Yea honestly I feel the same way, I’m closeted as well and most of the time I always wish that my parents were more supportive but they’re religious so it’s hard for them to understand. I’ve secretly went to pride festivals, got a binder, have been cutting my hair short and my parents are okay with it but definitely suspicious of me looking like a man. I’m just hoping one day I’ll have a stable job, move out and finally start transitioning.

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and it also frustrates me because. i’m doing everything else right! i’m going to the gym, eating healthier, getting good grades (so far..), following a strict routine; i feel good! but then i lay in bed at the end of the day and start to imagine myself as a man falling in love, and suddenly it’s like i’m stuck in this loop all over again. i even had the fleeting thought of going to a church to tell someone to talk me out of it. it feels like this is going to last forever :/ i am so deeply sad

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