Neurodivergent on Yik Yak | My one friend (A) is tired of having to constantly comfort and coax the other (B) into coming to group hangouts and A keeps getting overly pissed about it and I don’t know how to tell her to get over it. She cares about B but is tired of how much (cont.)

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Neurodivergent 22h

My one friend (A) is tired of having to constantly comfort and coax the other (B) into coming to group hangouts and A keeps getting overly pissed about it and I don’t know how to tell her to get over it. She cares about B but is tired of how much (cont.)

Anonymous 22h

energy she has to put into getting B to come hang out. B has really bad anxiety and with a little patience and comfort will show up and have fun. It really doesn’t take much. And I feel like A is being such a hypocrite about this.

Anonymous 21h

I mean, it’s very exhausting to be the emotional support for someone all the time. Your friend should stop putting in the energy if they don’t like it. Everyone has different support needs, and it sounds like your friend needs to have someone else take the reigns

Anonymous

OP 21h

A has some really bad meltdowns and such and I put a lot of energy into calming her down and trying to help her find a way to cope. It’s exhausting but I care so I find the energy and I make time (that I don’t always have) to help because she needs it. And I feel like this parallels what A is doing for B.

Anonymous

OP 21h

Someone needs some extra help and comfort to get past something and it feels like maybe progress can be made and they’ll get better at managing it independently over time but they don’t, or at least any progress is happening very slowly.

Anonymous

OP 21h

But I don’t know how to bring this up to A because she also has really bad anxiety and I don’t want to set her off, but I feel like I’m just gonna have to bite the bullet and say something.

Anonymous

#1 19h

I’m the only other one who can take the reigns, most of the core of our group graduated last year. I cannot be the only one who is going to put the effort to support all three of us, I already have my hands full with A but I can’t just leave B in the dust either and I still have to look out for myself. I understand you point, it is exhausting, but there isn’t really someone else to take the reigns.

Anonymous

#1 19h

B has made enough progress where all it takes is just meeting her outside for a sec and walking in with her I just don’t know how to tell A that she just needs a little more patience to help B over that last hurdle. I don’t mind sharing the reigns to support B but I cannot do everything