Neurodivergent on Yik Yak | Telling me “masking is unhealthy, you should stop! 🤓” hurts when I will lose my job and starve if I start getting perceived as a liability. “Being yourself” is a privilege and not everyone can. “Just quit and get a better job” isn’t in the cards

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Neurodivergent 12w

Telling me “masking is unhealthy, you should stop! 🤓” hurts when I will lose my job and starve if I start getting perceived as a liability. “Being yourself” is a privilege and not everyone can. “Just quit and get a better job” isn’t in the cards

688

Anonymous 12w

i feel like i see this tied to liberalism and the “yes i accept you SOOOO much but please be Normal or else i can’t support you anymore :’(“ type of shit iykwim

106

Anonymous 12w

man I can’t even disclose my status to my employer, I’d be fired on the spot

104

Anonymous 12w

On unrelated note. What pisses me off is when I unmask in front of my friends. they take everything I say seriously. I have to tell them I am joking or I just have a monotone voice. I gotta start put up this happy persona each time I am joking with them or out with them. 😭

Anonymous 12w

unfortunately very real, started unmasking a lot more at my previous job and ended up being fired for “not looking at he customer enough”… been job searching for 2 months now

Anonymous 12w

yeah unmasking all the time isn’t a realistic option for most people. hopefully you have a support system of friends you can be yourself around, but even that can be a luxury.

Anonymous 12w

Also, I like masking. I genuinely enjoy pretending to play a roll, like an actor, while I’m at work. It helps me separate my home space and work space much better too. What a lot of people don’t get is people without mental health diagnoses “mask” to a degree at work, no one is fully themselves, we’re all playing a roll. We just have to do it to a greater degree, and I’ve coped by letting it be fun to me. Like teehee look at me go! Trynna be an adult n shit. I’m so cute!

Anonymous 12w

My mask is practically hot glued to my face

Anonymous 12w

right especially when youre with your friends and you cant say ANYTHING without it being perceived as with an attitude or a problem when you’re literally just talking normally

Anonymous 12w

Feeling this with my neurodivergence AND my transness

Anonymous 12w

How do you even unmask to begin with

Anonymous 12w

THANK YOUUUU

Anonymous 11w

you guys have been able to mask at all? i’ve never been able to do it and it has not been by choice

Anonymous

#3 12w

YUP

Anonymous

#3 12w

there’s “acceptance” then there’s acceptance. pmo fr

Anonymous

#5 12w

im so goddamn fucking lucky ive found an audhd couple (autism husband adhd wife) to be friends w/ bc i do catch myself masking out of habit unfortunately but when the mask inevitably crashes they’re just like “hey there u are”

Anonymous

#3 12w

all that to say these ppl are out there and i hope u find them bc i think everyone deserves a shot at bomb fucking neurodivergent friends

Anonymous

#3 12w

lol, I am the only dude with autism in my college friend group. It just sucks knowing I gotta be joyful.

Anonymous

#3 12w

you lucky duck

Anonymous

#3 12w

I’m so lucky to have my gf cause she’s autistic too and I can just unmask around her and she loves me because of me and not in spite of it

Anonymous

#4 12w

it feels unreal and i feel the least deserving tbh

Anonymous

#7 12w

it’s giving wrongful termination of employment

Anonymous

#6 12w

they went off the fact the customer reported bad customer service so they fired me for that reason ig

Anonymous

#7 12w

They fired you off of one report? I’m so sorry :(

Anonymous

#6 12w

the one report is what they told me then proceeded to say this has happened before which i wasnt informed about. or at least been told i was in the wrong, as ive had negative customer service interactions where i was not in the wrong and my manager verified i wasnt

Anonymous

#2 12w

“it’s protected by the ADA! 🤓” the law is only so good as it’s enforced, kids

Anonymous

OP 12w

the ADA is pretty weak too. “Reasonable” verbiage is used a lot in ADA cases, and that’s not a fixed standard.

Anonymous

#3 12w

they think “unmasking” means the occasional cute little arm flap and not getting a joke here and there. and like yeah sometimes but sometimes unmasking means a complete personality switch

Anonymous

#12 12w

I am the trickster goddess of the fae, fear me 🤭

Anonymous

#5 12w

my bf telling me to let him know EVERY SINGLE TIME im not masking while we are together ✨✨😸

Anonymous

#10 12w

i was raised denied a diagnosis and learned to mask deeply as a pastor’s kid and as i’m learning to unmask im learning that that means forfeiting being constantly “sweet and kind” which is scary as fuck but necessary

Anonymous

#3 12w

but like i cannot afford to totally unmask myself. i have deeply right wing extended family who would see autism and go fuuuuck no. if i let myself go nonverbal w/ my parents they’d just be confused and upset.

Anonymous

OP 12w

Right? How easily can employers just put forward a different reason in its place to retroactively justify it, too? 😭

Anonymous

#16 12w

That’s so rough, I hope you find somewhere safer someday, I know it’s a minefield out there right now.

Anonymous

#17 11w

two things- 1. it’s alright if you can’t mask; we shouldn’t have to live in societal structures so delicate they are threatened by an autistic way of being, and there is nothing wrong with you 2. it can also be possible you just mask in ways you don’t realize; that was my case for a while. it’s also not my place to make assumptions n stuff about you, but i know i was unaware of my masking and thought i was being fully me (and weird) and i just wanted to offer this out of my own experience