I feel the same way!! I feel very disconnected from gender entirely, I feel like I’m “just a human” but I am afab and still definitely present very femininely. unfortunately nobody does really take my gender identity seriously. I feel like that is just how the world is. This stuff isn’t widely accepted.

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Same!! I dress pretty femme, and I’m nb afab/agender. I sometimes wear a they/them pin, but like #1 and #2 said, you just gotta believe in yourself and try not to take what strangers say seriously. Yes, it can hurt (I was called “lady” by a stranger), but we unfortunately just need to suck it up since the world isn’t always accepting and can judge us quickly :/

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as an afab nb something that helped me reframe was that if an amab wore a dress people would (generally) be very accepting of their gender non-conformity so why can’t i? also remembering that it doesn’t what matter what strangers think or even what people close me to me think, it’s about I feel! though i know that i don’t owe androgyny to anyone, sometimes mixing more masculine and more feminine aspects of my outfits is nice. like having a more masculine haircut and wearing feminine clothing

2

presenting in a way beyond expected androgyny might actually help to reinforce how meaningless gender rules are to you for the people around you. If they decide to get in a hissy fit, let them writhe and deal with it. Bounce around gendered aesthetics as you see fit.

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