Anonymous #2 3w

I was planning to ask him not to bring it up and that they didn’t know. Just for the first meeting

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I obv don’t know him so I can’t speak for his feelings, but personally, if I was him, it’d really bother me if my partner asked me not to talk about my child in front of their parents since that’d would be a major part of my life and something I wouldn’t be okay with being asked to hide like it’s an embarrassment or something. Sorry if that’s harsh but that’s just how I’d feel.

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Anonymous #2 3w

No, I posted this for opinions! Don’t apologize. That is a good point. Do you think I should just tell them or should I ask him how he feels about it?

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Anonymous OP 3w

I mean, asking him how he feels about it would still be telling him you’ve at least considered asking him to keep quiet about it so you’d still be risking offending him, at least that’s how I’d perceive it. If I were you, I’d just tell my parents, as soon as possible, that way they have more time for the shock to wear off before actually meeting him (assuming you think they’d react that way).

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Anonymous OP 3w

If you think there’s a real possibility of them reacting very poorly or getting upset, it’s also best to tell them beforehand bc if their reaction is really bad, you might want to consider just not having them meet him at all, at least for a time. Again, I don’t know your parents, but if there’s a possibility they’d not be able to respect him after knowing that, then he doesn’t deserve to be brought into an environment where he’s going to be looked down upon or disrespected by them

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Anonymous #2 3w

Okay, I understand. My problem is that my mom is my ride. If she does disapprove(which I don’t know whether she will or not), she may not give me rides anymore. I can’t drive and I really can’t afford uber to meet with him. And he doesn’t drive either. I don’t want to upset him but my parents do technically have control because they can refuse to drive me to meet with him and I won’t really have much of a way around that

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Anonymous OP 3w

I feel you and get why that’d be a consideration regarding this, but all I can say is that I still wouldn’t consider it worthwhile to hide his child from them over, and if she’d stop helping you out just bc of this, that’s a sign that you should start doing whatever you can to become more independent from them so that you aren’t put in future situations where you have to pick between being your genuine self and having access to essential services like transportation. Still, I sympathize with you

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Anonymous #2 3w

Okay, thank you for the perspective!

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Anonymous OP 3w

You’re welcome, good luck with all this :)

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