Anonymous #2 1d

no yeah, this is like genuinely how i feel thank you for putting it into words. my whole thing is like me not experiencing things on my own just makes me jump to feeling like i shouldn’t be in a relationship. i’m just worried like once i do start doing my own things, what if i find out that i want to be on my own?

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Anonymous OP 1d

There’s nothing wrong with that. Life’s too short might as well give it a try, if not you’ll still have these feelings and wonder why you didn’t do anything about it

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Anonymous #2 1d

yeah it’s just terrifying. i feel like i’ve locked myself down so much and ik it might be messy getting out of it but i just don’t want to regret it. i wish there was a way to explore then come back if i find it isn’t for me

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Anonymous #3 1d

it is reasonable for us and our situation currently. we handle a lot of our expenses together and i am fine with that. i have 2 of my own bank accounts and investments so its not the worst thing in the world

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Anonymous #4 1d

definetly bc i FOR SURE just want to cheat. like where did that even come from?

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Anonymous OP 21h

if i can ask, in what way is it reasonable?

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Anonymous #3 21h

this is prob naive to say like there most likely was a better way to handle and approach it and i can admit that. but handling rent seemed easier having it come out of the same account, same with electricity and internet. we also were not wanting to get to a point where we hold things we’ve bought for each other over the other one’s head, i think he’s experienced that in the past.

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Anonymous #5 21h

But just be very cautious about bringing in finances. It’s important to know someone for some time to truly know their character especially during hardships. But I wouldn’t say that you are missing out opportunities if you genuinely feel like this individual is someone you will continue to choose and want to grow with

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Anonymous #5 21h

yeah definetly. i trust him a lot and i usually have an easy time telling character and stuff. i dont believe he would ever do anything bad to hurt me in any way. one of the things i wish i said in my original post was that i feel like ive missed important self discovery that comes with living on your own and doing things on your own. i’ve definetly learned a lot abt myself living with him and doing life with him which i love but then again, i feel like im missing a key piece at this age

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Anonymous OP 21h

Truthfully I’ve never lived solely on my own, and that’s ok, because that’s where communication comes in, all it takes is a simple “hey I really appreciate you helping me out with X,Y, and Z, but for my own self knowledge and learning, I’ll take on the responsibility of ______. Not that you are doing anything wrong or I don’t appreciate the help, but for now, I just want to feel self accomplished in this aspect if that makes sense” or something along those lines

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Anonymous #5 21h

Living alone or together both have positives and negatives, so don’t feel like you’d be missing out, like I said all it takes is communication there is no set way of living when sharing a space

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Anonymous #5 21h

love that. thank you

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Anonymous OP 16h

yeah, those things need to be separate imo. and i know from personal experience what its like for a partner to hold gifts over you, so i can say that i understand his feelings but this isn't the way to go. he needs to be able to trust that you won't do that even if you could. its a difficult convo, but i'd really recommend separating your finances

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