
Kind of unrelated, but it's funny how in a lot of of these stories the guy just HAS to always come over to the girls place. Why can it never be done at his? Anyhow, your roommate is 100% valid. Had a friend that smokes and lived in a shared dorm her first year and yk what she did when she asked and her roommate was uncomfortable? Find another space to do it
Ah yes, the classic âeveryone does it/itâs collegeâ excuse. If your friend isnât comfortable with unknown men being in her space then no unknown men are gonna be in that shared space end of story. Itâs insane the number of people who think college is an excuse to disrespect their roommateâs boundaries.
Last year my roomate would bring guys over when I wasnât there even though i said I wasnât comfortable with them being there when I wasnât there and she just didnât care I would come back to there clothes on the floor and I would ask if they were hers and she would say yea but clearly was a manâs outfit
i get both sides but the argument always goes the other way - itâs a shared room so youâre going to have to make sacrifices and compromises. now iâm not saying your roommate is in the wrong, but it is normal for college students to bang in their dorms, and sometimes you may just have to go to the library or watch a movie. if one roommate wants the room for a day to fuck, so be it, but if the other roommate doesnât want that at all, you gotta come up with a middle ground. maybe give her the space
actually incredibly related cuz my first question was "why isn't his place an option?" and... get this... his roommates don't want ppl over for sex either for basically the same reasons đ from what i heard those boys had no issue with that boundary... like girl you can't be worse than 4 fuckboys at respecting boundaries...
once a month or on specific days. iâm all for boundaries but i donât think itâs fair to make the roommate get a hotel when she very well could do the same to share the space. this is definitely a choose your battles issue and honestly itâs far easier to compromise this one than to do an all or nothing. just like she doesnât want to have the âbadâ roommate that has sex in the dorm, you donât want to be the room hog roommate as well.
Counterpoint: the roommate can find somewhere else to go. My campus has single gender dorms and doesnât allow the opposite gender in them so couples have to get creative. They go make out in study/practice rooms, get motel rooms, get in cars together. Being told they canât use the room isnât the end of the world. OP even said that the reason his place wasnât available was because his roommates have the same rule, so itâs hypocritical for them to respect his roommatesâ rule but not the friendâs.