
When I look in the mirror I’m only just starting to recognize myself. Especially since I’ve spent so much time on this app communicating as a woman without anyone needing to see me to talk to me. My sense of self isn’t very connected to my own body so I just don’t even feel like it’s mine yet. I probably will eventually once I’m actually presenting more fem. And I already am feeling it somewhat since my face is starting to change shape a bit. But yea overall I don’t feel like it’s mine.
might be influenced by my medical issues but ive never felt displaced in my body. like its fucked up and hurts all the time and its not even really shaped the way i wish it was but its still mine, i still feel it and it still holds me. its like a room that im trying to make my own, remodelling and decorating so its not just four walls but a real lived in space that i fit in at the end of every day
I feel like part of transitioning, at least for me, is actually taking ownership of my body and making it actually mine. And actually reflective of my internal sense of self. Even beyond just being a woman but also just being ME. Like my own sense of self as a unique person as well. This also gets into family shit where they tried to get me to fit into a mold of how they wanted me to act my whole life. So it’s partially that. But yea that’s my feelings on it. I could write loads more but Im eepy