Anonymous #1 1d

If submissiveness isn’t the point, then why is it utilized as an insult or slur to attack Republicans? Do you at least understand how that might make me either or both a) less likely to be open about my sexuality for fear of being judged or that people STILL hold onto the social stigmas and norms that reinforce stereotypical relationships and sex b) offended that they’re attacking a characteristic that I share, despite having a contradicting ideology entirely to those same Republican.

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Anonymous #1 1d

I feel similarly when someone’s main attack towards a Republican is something like their weight or how they look - how is someone supposed to feel when they sss people they canvass with, they volunteer with, who they agree with entirely bashing a trait that they share, even if it’s targeted to the bad guys - you’re causing collateral damage imo. I think we should be more careful to not hurt third parties.

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Anonymous #1 1d

I don't think the people making those jokes are thinking about guys like you at all. They're aiming at men who've made toughness and dominance their whole political identity, and the joke is basically "you're not who you claim to be" and trying to get a rise out of them because of it. I do get what you mean though. Not going to tell you to “just get over it” because I think your hurt is probably a valid one.

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Anonymous #1 1d

Typically it’s using almost always using caricature imo. For instance, calling rural Republicans hillbillies or rednecks and using a certain caricature to go at them.

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Anonymous ___joker__ 1d

I just don’t really understand how you can mock a trait like this but only towards specific people. If you call a shitty person fat, how exactly are you not just using fat as a slur or insult towards them? How does that not just reinforce that “fat” is a bad thing? How am I supposed to react to something about my personality and identity getting mocked, just for people to essentially go “Oh I don’t mean it for you - you’re one of the good ones”

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Anonymous ___joker__ 1d

Would you think Black people should simply understand, not be offended, and know that racist comments made about Candace Owen’s by white liberals or leftists don’t apply to them? Many peiple would argue it’s appropriate due to her largely stabbing the Black community in the back. But it’s obviously not acceptable to do. I just don’t think it’s acceptable to reduce the traits to the bad thing instead of the behavior. Why not just attack the bad behavior?

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Anonymous ___joker__ 1d

So would you disagree with my claim that people often use fat or kinks as weaponry against someone they dislike to attack them? I’m not talking about using hillbillies or rednecks, I’m specifically talking about using traits like sexual identity, and physical appearance. I’m talking about this because a lot of people on the left have made me feel like there’s something wrong with me just because I share some traits with conservatives. I’m tired of being told the person I am and the identity..

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Anonymous #1 1d

It’s entirely built around intent of the use, which is more a language thing. You’re not wrong by any means because a third party can get hurt, but it’s dependent on how they perceive the insult, not whether or not the person who is using the insults original intent.

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Anonymous ___joker__ 1d

that I’ve struggled with for years is wrong and bad and diminished to a cheap insult instead of attacking them for the things they’ve done wrong. I’m tired of being grouped in with some of the worst humans in the world solely because I don’t have interest in normal sexual encounters. It’s really not that much to ask that the left just allow people to feel comfortable in their own body. I find this specific issue counter to so many of the ideals 99% of us hold, and it just really upsets me man

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Anonymous #1 1d

Well, racism is entirely different because being black is immutable.

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Anonymous ___joker__ 1d

I can tell we aren’t going to agree so idk what else to say. I think it’s really dissapointing to see people on my side of the aisle defend people utilizing these things as slurs How exactly is my sexual identity not immutable either? Please tell me how someone can change their sexual identity - I’ve been trying for YEARS.

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Anonymous #1 1d

I can’t really give you a simple answer that would make sense. Weirdly enough, I’ve done a fair bit of reading on the philosophy of language and the nonverbal. I’m not really the best person to explain meaning or intent. I would highly suggest looking into the philosophy of language…then again it also blackpilled the fuck out of me

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Anonymous ___joker__ 1d

Like Wittgenstein? (philosophy minor :) I mean sure, he’d argue that often we don’t say what we mean, but there’s also scenarios where intent just doesn’t matter, or where looking for it would be meaningless. (iirc - it’s been a while and i have very much been wrong before lmao) I’d argue that when someone is hurt because you’re attacking someone for an identical characteristic that another person has, this is one of those scenarios where intent doesn’t matter, if you continue to act.

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Anonymous ___joker__ 1d

To me, it’s honestly starting to feel like the opposite. No matter how many lefty spaces I talk about how it’s frustrating and offensive and really makes me feel bad about my sexual identity, I always just have folks defend the behavior. I asked this question largely because I’m starting to feel like a lot of those voices on the left DO think that the trait is wrong and incorrect. I am feeling like they DO have intent, or they’d at least apologize and stop when confronted.

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Anonymous ___joker__ 1d

Like, if a white dude uses a slur to call his black friend “the greatest most reliable human ever, and the single greatest most loving person on the planet”, and that’s his intent - I’d disagree that it wasn’t racist. Intent doesn’t determine the actual outcome. It’s on the person to rectify a situation if their intent harms unintended people - and I want more people on the left who use this rhetoric (not saying you to be clear <3) to actually start caring about the harm and offense it causes

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Anonymous #1 1d

Yes! Holy shit. Someone else who has read Wittgenstein! When I was doing my undergrad, I read him. His stuff was pretty heavy and I haven’t been able to get over it.

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Anonymous #1 23h

I’m not knowledgeable enough on sexuality and the intricacies of kinks to know what is and what isn’t immutable in this instance so I wouldn’t really be comfortable making a strong assertion. Though I don’t think something necessarily has to be immutable to be consistent with your points.

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