It insists upon itself

18

The imagery is astounding! My only note would be to really read it aloud and play with the amount of syllables for each line to make it flow as best it can, and that in turn will make the rhyme scheme clearer. It was a bit difficult to get a sense of the pattern in certain lines, but poetry is really hard and the message here is beautiful 💜

11

Aww love this. I think some of the lines could be tightened to best fit the rhyming meter that’s my one note. it’s a lovely piece

6

Yes

5

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0