Anonymous sea_taco 6w

Obviously it hurts; I definitely wouldn’t call it a “fulfilling” experience, but it’s not morally wrong to friendzone someone if you don’t feel the same. However, the last two sentences of the OP are a red flag imo.

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Anonymous #8 6w

okay so again just because you like someone doesn't mean they owe you a relationship. if you approach things with that intention of course you are going to get disappointed?? like you should be going into first dates to get to know the person and if it doesn't work out then you at least you gain a new friend!

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Anonymous #7 6w

i feel like context is needed here bc idk how u can fall in love with someone you aren't even dating

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Anonymous OP 6w

Lmao that’s a good joke

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Anonymous #7 6w

i genuinely don't know what you mean? like what are you talking about? like someone you've been causally seeing for few months ? or like just someone that u might interact with every so often?? or someone you were dating but then they broke up with you and said you could still be friends?? if it's that one i understand but the first two it's weird if ur falling in love with ppl you barely know.

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Anonymous OP 6w

Feelings can develop over time with friendships is what they meant

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Anonymous OP 6w

So you’ve never had a crush before?

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Anonymous #8 6w

i've never experienced that bc romantic love in general is so different from platonic within my experience

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Anonymous #7 6w

of course i've had a crush but having a crush is not the same as falling in love i fear. having a crush is "oh i think their attractive and fun to be around and want to be around them more" falling in love is like "i would die for this person and we have a deep mutual respect and trust for each other"

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Anonymous OP 6w

I guess I’m built different then because I’ve had crushes that were pretty intense.

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Anonymous #7 6w

have you been in a relationship before? it's like so different from a friendship, i don't know how u could have any more intense of a crush if someone isn't like building a relationship with you based on intimacy, trust and and respect. that's like what builds to love at least for me. if you're talking abt like a fwb i can see falling in love with them but just like a friend?

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Anonymous OP 6w

Yeah I have, that’s why I asked if you’ve ever had a crush before because think of developing a crush on someone who happens to be a friend.

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Anonymous #7 6w

i haven't really had crushes on friends before. i just feel like romantic and platonic relationships r so different and i don't go into any relationship with the expectation of it being anything than a friendship.

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Anonymous OP 6w

Most of the time you don’t really plan on getting into a friendship with someone who you’re in love with, most of the time you just develop feelings for someone who happens to be your friend.

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Anonymous #7 6w

see you just lose me at the "developing feelings" part, like i feel like to develop feelings you need to see that person every day, trust them more than you trust other people, have a deep emotional bond. you can have that with friends ig but like with your partner it's obviously different. i don't see my friends everyday and i trust them but i wouldn't trust them to like see me naked like i would a romantic and sexual partner. and then for me at least sex plays a big role

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Anonymous #10 6w

Wasn’t the term friendzone coined because of a scene in ‘Friends’ where Ross confessed to Rachael and she basically says she sees him as a friend.

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Anonymous #7 6w

Yes because he pretended to be her friend for years then got mad that she didn’t want to date him. Ross is a shit person on the show you’re proving my point

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Anonymous #10 6w

Wdym? Wasn’t he friends with her before the feelings?

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Anonymous #7 6w

No. He was in love with her since he knew her in high school

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Anonymous #7 6w

It’s his main character point. He hides feelings from Rachel then gets mad that she dates other men because she doesn’t know that he has feelings because he never said them. Since high school. He also never fucking told her, Chandler did on accident at her birthday party while he was flying to China

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Anonymous #10 6w

Oh ok, although tbh I feel like most guys use the definition I use and everyone else uses your definition, so I think we are just using different definitions.

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Anonymous #10 6w

Friendzoned is gender neutral you moron, girls get friendzoned by guys too.

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Anonymous #10 6w

Someone having feeling for one person, that the other person doesn’t feel back, is a universal human experience. We literally have plays and myths from thousands of years ago from all over the world about both men and women going through that same experience.

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Anonymous OP 6w

They never said that though? Like yeah, that can be a good way to look at it, but also, just because you want to be platonic friends with someone who wants a romantic relationship doesn’t mean that they owe you platonic friendship.

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